Page 234 of Lady for Embers

“There are other ways for her to claim her vengeance,” Azrael said, a sharp edge seeping into his tone.

“Do not save me, Azrael Luan. I will do what I can, help wherever I am able, with the time she allows me. But when the time comes, do not try to save me. Swear it.”

“I won’t.”

“What?”

“I will not swear that to you.” He stepped right up to the bars. “I told you that when you were standing among the destruction you brought about, I would be out there. I told you that you and I were not done.”

“There is nothing left of me, Azrael!” she cried. “Can you not see that? The weight of my sins? It is killing me. I cannot breathe.”

“You wish for death?” he demanded.

Her gaze dropped to the dirty stone ?oor she was sitting on. Grime and mud covered her feet. They’d taken her boots off of her before they’d secured the shackles around her ankles.

“Answer me, Talwyn Semiria. Look me in the eye and tell me you wish for death.”

“Look intomyeyes and tell me what you see, Az! Because there is nothing left of me but rubble and lies and betrayal.”

“Do you wish for death?” he repeated.

“Death will come for me whether I wish for it or not.”

“Answer the damn question, Talwyn. Do you wish for death?”

“No!” she cried, irritation bursting forth at his repeated demand. “But you cannot save me.”

“You are right,” he answered. “Only you can do that.”

“My life does not lie in my hands.”

“No, but you can at least try, Talwyn. You cantryto save yourself instead of repeating the self-deprecating monologue that clearly runs through your head nonstop.”

“Gee, Az. Tell me how you really feel,” she muttered.

“I will ?ght for you even if you will not,” he replied. “Even if it seems hopeless and impossible, I will ?ght for you.”

“You will ?ght her?”

“That is not what I said,” Azrael answered. “I said I will ?ght for you. Even if it amounts to nothing, at least I will be able to say I tried. Just like I tried to tell you who Tarek was, what he wanted. Just like I tried to make you see reason about this kingdom. Itried, Talwyn. I can live with myself knowing I tried to do something, even if it amounts to nothing.”

She didn’t know what to say to him, so she said nothing.

“You have made costly choices, Talwyn, but that does not meanyou cannot do some good before you leave this world. You proved you are capable of such by getting word to Briar about Ashtine.”

“Only if you lot can get there in time. If you cannot, it was simply another failure.”

Azrael shook his head, stepping back from the bars. He sent a message off among a swirl of leaves, then stood waiting for the guards to return.

“This hate you ?nd yourself so deserving of? It is the same hate that ruled you and led you to make the choices that landed you here.” The sound of boots on the stairs ?ltered in. “Look at what you were capable of with hate. Imagine if you put that much effort into something else, something far less exhausting than this self-pity and self-loathing you have developed.”

“Like what?” she snapped, the guards appearing and taking up their posts. The sentry stood by the archway, waiting for Azrael.

“Like living, Talwyn.”

Chapter 45

Cyrus

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