Page 225 of Lady of Ashes

But she was also obsessing over something, or many things he supposed, the Sorceress had said. Something that was said was driving her to utter madness, but when they’d arrived back at the Black Halls, he didn’t have it in him to press her about what she was figuring out. Not when she went straight into the bathing chamber and shut the door behind her. When she emerged later with wet hair, he could tell she’d gone to that place though. That place where other voices threatened her stars, so he’d spent the next hour reminding her of who she belonged to. The clarity in her eyes as she drifted off to sleep had been worth putting off the conversation of what had set her on edge.

He bent, brushing a soft kiss to her temple. A small murmur was his only answer, and he pulled the blankets up over her shoulder before he slipped from the bed. He shoved his legs into some pants, not bothering to button them, and made his way to the sofa in front of the hearth. He pulled her notes and translations to him once again, running his hand down his face.

They’d had little time to speak privately since she’d woken this morning, after sleeping for nearly two days. Cyrus’s questions about the High Witch were the ?rst and only thing she’d spoken about in regards to the ?ght at the Contessa’s river front estate, and he had so many questions to ask her.

And these seraphs the Sorceress had mentioned? They were one of the biggest things they needed to ?gure out, but that wasn’t what he was looking for tonight. No, tonight he’d be looking for the same thing he’d been looking for since he got her back.She’d used so much of her power during that battle, and they’d only gotten her to drink a few sips of his blood before she’d fallen into one of those deep sleeps that would restore her ?re and water gifts. She hadn’t asked for more when she’d seen him, and he knew better than to push that right now, despite her eyes being more bluish-silver than the bright silver he’d begun to grow accustomed to. So here he sat, ri?ing through books he could hardly decipher, trying to ?nd the answer.

Three days later, Sorin woke to a cold bed, just as he had every morning since their visit to the Sorceress. He wasn’t concerned as he slid from the sheets, splashed cold water on his face, and dressed in casual pants and a tunic for the day. He knew where he’d ?nd her. Down on the beach where she had been the last two mornings. Cassius would be there, watching over her.

She’d been only half-present these last few days. She would train in the mornings, and then go straight to that chamber in the Wind Court right after lunch. There she would stay until Sorin would remind her that eating and sleeping were necessary. She’d pack up her notes with a small, wary smile and let him lead her from the Citadel catacombs, where they’d meet up with the others for a quiet dinner. They’d ?ll her in on various happenings in the Courts. She’d make any necessary decisions and update them on some of her own ?ndings. They tried not to push her to share more, trying to ?nd a balance between letting her ?gure out how to trust and depend on them, while also allowing her to make her own way as queen. She’d go back to their rooms and bury herself in books again, falling asleep on the sofa with a book in her lap and rising before the sun was fully up.

He’d left small glasses of his blood for her, and they’d be emptied when he checked, so he knew she was drinking them, but her eyes weren’t as bright. Not since that trip to the Sorceress. Maybe, he’d realized, she hadn’t come away the victor after all.

Sorin stepped from a ?re portal onto the beach, walking a few feet to come to a stop beside Cassius. Scarlett was walking barefoot through the surf as it rolled onto the sand, shadows trailing in her wake.

Neither male said anything for several minutes before Cassius broke the silence.

“Don’t say anything about it. Tell the others.”

Sorin’s eyes were ?xed on his wife as he asked, “What is the Guardian bond like for you?”

Cassius glanced at him. “What?”

“What can you feel from her? I can feel her emotions, feel her presence, speak down our bond into her mind. Can you do any of that?” Sorin clari?ed, sliding his hands into his pockets.

“No,” Cassius said. “None of those things. I guess I can kind of sense her presence. Not like I’ve witnessed between you two, but a smaller-scale version of that part maybe? But I can feel when she is hurt physically. When we are training and she takes a hit, I feel that. And I can feel when her power reserves are getting too low if it begins to become a threat to her wellbeing. It feels like a pull on my very soul when she draws from me.”

Sorin didn’t say anything. Just nodded in acknowledgment. Several more minutes of silence passed between them, the sun climbing higher.

“I have not seen her like this in a very long time,” Cassius said quietly, once again breaking that silence.

“She struggles with things Alaric has whispered into her ear for years,” Sorin answered.

Cassius nodded knowingly. “Yes, but this is … not that.”

At that, Sorin turned to look at him. “What do you mean?”

“This is …” He pushed out a long breath, running a hand through his brown hair. He’d cut it shorter a few days ago. It was shaggy, curling around his ears. “This is the calm before the storm, Sorin.” Cassius turned his entire body to face him. “I know you all wish she shared more, included you more on her scheming and planning, and while I agree that she does need to do that, you also need to let her … beher, Sorin. That brilliant, wicked, cunning thing you fell in love with? Let her be that.”

Sorin stiffened. “I do not wish to change her, Cassius,” he said defensively. “I never have. I just need her to recognize she is not alone, that she does not need to face this alone. That she has others she can trust.”

“I know that. And I know that she can be brash and reckless and so godsdamn infuriating. But I also know that as soon as everything clicks into place for whatever she is working out, she willbring you all in. I see it at our nightly dinners. I see it when she lets you read through her notes while she pores over books. She’s trying to include you all, but you know as well as I do that she’s the one who is going to ?gure this out. We can try to help, but honestly, the best thing you can do to help her right now is let her build up that storm. Because when she unleashes it?” Cassius shook his head, as if he couldn’t ?nd the words to ?nish his thoughts.

“When she unleashes it, there will be nothing left but ashes in her wake,” Sorin ?nished for him.

“I want to show you something,” Sorin said softly into her ear when they rose from the table after dinner that night. His Court knew what he had planned. He’d asked some of the staff to clean and prepare the room the day he’d found out what day this was.

Her head tilted quizzically to the side. “I hate to tell you this, Prince, but I’ve already seen everything you have to offer.”

He ?icked her nose, nipping at her earlobe when he murmured, “You really have not, Love.” He felt the small tremor run down her body, saw her limbs tense slightly at his tone, and he grinned against her skin. “Will you let me show you?”

She nodded slightly, and he brought his hand to her lower back, ushering her from the room. Cyrus caught his eye over the top of her head, sending him a knowing wink. When they were out of the dining room and walking down a quiet hall, he said, “Have I told you lately how absolutely stunning you are?”

She’d changed before dinner into a simple dress. It was a rose pink color and was so godsdamnfeminine. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d seen her in a dress. He was certain he’d never seen her in pink of all colors, and it was so … unexpected. It had a wide neckline and scooped down the back, cinching at her waist before ?owing to the ?oor. He had nearly stopped breathing when she’d emerged from the dressing room to head down to dinner with the others.

“Mmm,” she hummed now, “you may have mentioned it a time or two this evening.”

A time or two was an understatement. She’d pinned her hair up, exposing the column of her neck. Dinner had, admittedly, beenthe last thing on his mind at that point. He’d hardly tasted the ?sh and vegetables that had been prepared.

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