Page 99 of Hits Different

But I couldn’t pass up the chance of seeing my dad. Especially with my birthday looming. I hold out no hope that my mother will make an appearance, and the dark and twisted part of me that nobody ever sees thinks that it’s probably a good thing.

Normally, I’m not a birthday person. Being a July baby, school was always out and most kids were on vacation which made birthday parties kind of a bust, until Parker showed up and changed everything.

One year it was just me and my dad; my mother was in South Africa on a wellness retreat with some of her co-stars. He woke me up early, played soccer in the garden, then took me to the movies, just me and him.

Normally he’d just drop me off, but he came in with me that time. I don’t even remember what the film was. But I remember that he put an arm around me, and laughed when I laughed, not because he found it funny, but he liked seeing me happy.

He was wearing his light brown leather jacket, the one with the scuffs. We devoured milkshakes and burgers afterwards, and he listened intently when I told him all about my fantasy soccer team and shared theories about why my boyhood hero Nate Suarez was definitely going to move to the premier league the following season.

I was nine years old. I fell asleep on the couch with him when we got home, and when I woke up, he’d wrapped the jacket around me.

It's not a core memory, but it’s a good one. One that warms me from the inside, even though it’s fifty degrees and I’m driving with the top down.

The next year, he ran for Governor, and everything changed. He stopped sneaking into my room between conference calls for rounds of soccer video games. Then, he changed his mind about soccer altogether. He started spending more and more time in the office, on the campaign trail, in Washington.

By the time he was Senator, it was like we had become strangers. And the things that had once mattered didn’t matter so much anymore. Like soccer summer, or swimming lessons on Fridays.

Or me. Then, everything else happened.

I turn the volume up to drown it all out.

But as I get closer to home, something twists in my gut. Truth be told, I haven’t spent much time here since that night, when Parker and I…you know. But now I’m going to see my dad. And I’m going to fix things.

Even if I haven’t figured out how just yet.

I pull up at a red and sneakily check my phone. Parker’s shot me a picture. God damn. We’re snuggled up with a glass of champagne between us, even though Parker doesn’t drink it, and I can’t stand the taste. The lighting is low, there’s a pizza box in the background. It’s a mess in a hundred different ways.

But damn, do I look happy. Really happy. Not the shiny kind. The real kind.

The second I pull into my driveway I save the picture as my phone background.

* * * *

“Dad?” My voice slides across shiny white marble. A deep voice calls back, and I bounce on the balls of my feet as footsteps get closer. He’s really here. Okay. Deep breath. I’m just gonna start with an apology. And go from there.

But it’s not my dad.

It’s Winston. “Brandon. This is a nice surprise”.

“It shouldn’t be. You knew I was coming”, I peer past him, “Is my dad back there?”

“He’s on his book tour”. A crease forms across Winston’s forehead. “Didn’t he tell you?”

I stop dead. “Book tour?” I say, my voice higher than it should be. “But you said…when we spoke…he was supposed to be here”. It all comes out in a jumble.

“Brandon, your father has obligations”, Winston says, in a tone that sounds kind and patronising all at once. “A lot of people rely on him to show up for them”.

I know. I’m one of them.

I take a deep breath, fighting for control. “When did he leave?”

“This morning. If you’d have been here earlier instead of doing…well, whatever it is you were doing last night”, I blush furiously, hoping that he doesn’t notice. “You’d know that”. Winston checks his watch. “If it’s truly important, we can schedule a call before he gets on the plane, but…”

“When is he coming back?” I interrupt. Fine, okay—if he’s not back until tonight then I can just stay another day. It won’t matter too much. Then I’d get my full birthday with him anyway. “Tonight?”

“The fifteenth”.

“That’s over a week away!” I blurt out. Winston raises his eyebrows. “Winston, youknewI wanted to see him”.

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