Page 123 of Hits Different

The referee raises my arm. “The winner, fighting out of Basement MMA…Parker Di Rossi!” I take it in, basking in the moment. This is it. I did it.

Damn kid,my dad says,I wish I could have seen this.

But when I reach for him, he's not there.

****

A blur of lights. Voices. Everyone sounds very far away. Where the hell am I?

“Parker”, Zara unclips my gloves. “Parker. Can you hear me?”

“What’s wrong with him?” Something twangs. A flash of red. We’re in the locker room. How did I get here? Will steers me towards a bench.

“Get Brandon”, Simon shouts. “Now”. Archie breaks off at a run. Simon pulls Zara into a corner, talking in hurried whispers.

Zara appears in-front of me. “We’re going to get you some help, okay? Just breathe”.

“I’m good”, I say, but it comes out as a cough, then something else. Something guttural. Has someone been crying?

Someone from the venue tries to open the door but Jack blocks it. I try to protest. This is ridiculous. I don’t know what everyone’s making such a big deal about. We should be celebrating.

Oh, it’s me. I’m the one crying.

The door opens again. Brandon looks between me, and everyone else. “Everyone out”, he says sharply. “Now”. Nobody argues.

The door closes behind them. Brandon crouches down next to me. I can’t breathe. I need to tell him. To make him understand. “Brandon…”.

“It’s okay”, Brandon pulls me closer. “I’m here”.

“I’m fine, it’s just…”.

“I know, Parker. Iknow. You don’t need to hide it anymore”.

“I got…” I try, but it comes out as a sob. “I got everything I ever wanted”.

Chapter 46

Safe Place

Brandon

“I thought it would feeldifferent”, Parker says quietly. He’s staring numbly out of the window. Car headlights whiz by. I focus on putting as much distance as possible between him and what just happened.

I got us back to the car without anyone noticing. I’d slung his bag over my shoulder and weaved him in and out of the crowd. He’d kept his hood up, head down. He’s still in his MMA gear, but I’ve wrapped his grey zip up hoodie around him.

He was shaking. A lot.

There’s a couple of scuffs where his jawline bloodied his opponent’s knuckles, but it’s the deepness of his brown eyes, hollow and wet, that rip right through me.

Parker on the edge isn’t new. Not to me. But it starts and ends with his dad. I don’t think either of us have ever faced that before. His light may not have gone out, but it flickered against the wind. Angrily. Desperately.

“You already know”, Parker says. “Don’t you?” I nod, even though he’s not looking at me. “It’s stupid. It’s not like I thought winning a fight would bring him back”.

“It’s light years away from stupid, Parker”.

“It’s not stupid to pretend that someone’s there when you know they’re not?”

“That’s exactly the time you’re supposed to do it”.

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