Page 28 of Speed

“So, I have an older brother, Logan, and he’s my best friend. He’s married to Sadie and is Avery’s dad. He turned his back on a career in driving, got thrown out of the house by my grandfather, and cut off from the family money, but survived. He’s now my agent, so that’s a fuck-you to the old man.”

“Brody—”

I forged ahead. “But there's also my other brother…” I swallowed—the pain of childhood loss was still there. “Charlie was two years younger than me.”

“‘Was’?”

This was always the hardest part, and I swallowed, the words sticking slightly. “Mom, Dad, and Charlie died in a light aircraft accident when I was seven. Dad was piloting—he’d been drinking or was high. End of story.”

Noah’s face was a storm of emotions now—pity, sadness, anger, and something else I couldn’t name. He stared at me like he was trying to determine if I was messing with him.

I didn’t want his pity. I didn’t want to make him sad or angry. I didn’t want any of that.

“Jesus, Brody,” he said after a long pause, his voice quiet but heavy. “That’s… a lot.”

I shrugged again, keeping my expression neutral. “It is what it is.”

“No, it’s not,” he snapped, his brows furrowing deeper. “It’s not just ‘what it is.’ You were seven, and your dad—” He bit his lip as if he wasn’t sure how far to go.

“It’s fine,” I said. “It was a long time ago.”

“It’s not fine,” Noah said, his voice softer now, but still full of frustration. “And you saying it like that doesn’t make it fine.”

I glanced at him, his expression open, raw, and unguarded. “What do you want me to say?” I asked, my tone sharper than I intended. “That it screwed me up? That I still think about it every day. Because I don’t. My biggest rival wasn't on the track, but in my own family, and proving myself made me strong and a winner.” My chest was tight because I wasn’t a fucking winner. I had no clue what I was doing with whatever remained of my disordered life.

Noah’s lips parted as if he wanted to argue, but he kept quiet, studying me. Finally, he said, “I’m sorry.”

I let out a dry laugh. “Don’t be. It’s not your fault.”

“No,” he said, his voice steady now. “But it still sucks. And I’m still sorry.”

I didn’t know what to say, so I said nothing. Noah’s gaze stayed on me. For once, I didn’t feel the need to look away.

“Tell me what your grandfather did to you,” Noah said, calm but unrelenting.

“That's between me and my therapist,” I shot back. “Sorry, I didn’t mean…”

Noah didn’t flinch. “Does he know you’re attracted to men?”

“I’m not. It’s just you… it’s…” I scrubbed my eyes. “No, he doesn’t.”

Noah tilted his head, studying me with that steady gaze of his. “Why not?”

I let out a bitter laugh, running a hand through my hair. “Because he has plans for me, okay? World champion, legacy, a stunning woman by my side, creating a brand-new generation of Vance kids to carry on the name. That’s the plan. His plan.” I could feel the weight of it pressing down on me, every expectation he’d drilled into me since I was a kid. “He made me the best driver I could be,” I continued, my voice growing quieter. “He forged me out of bitterness as if I was a weapon he could wield.”

Noah stayed quiet, but I could see his jaw tightening, his hands curling into fists at his sides.

“And now?” I whispered, my voice breaking. “Now I’m just…”

My legs gave way, and before I knew it, I was sliding down the wall, the cold surface biting into my back until I hit the floor. I rested my arms on my knees, staring at the space between my feet as the words tumbled out, raw and unfiltered.

“Used up and fucking lost.”

The silence that followed was heavy, but Noah didn’t leave. He didn’t try to fix it or fill the space with meaningless platitudes. Instead, he crouched in front of me, his expression fierce, grounding me in a way I didn’t know I needed.

“You’re not done, Brody.” His steady voice was full of conviction. “You just need to figure out what you want—not what he wants or anyone else expects. You.”

I swallowed hard, my chest tightening even more. I wanted to believe him, but the truth was, I didn’t know where to start. Maybe I should start with the one thing I could decide.

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