Page 58 of Speed

After a thorough check-up and a thousand questions about mental health, he made the call. I was put on the injured reserve list. Which sucked big time. I would be able to return to active play in seven days, which, thank all the hockey gods, got me on the ice for the season opener against Washington, but it still blew.

“So I’m not being sent down?” I asked Doc for the tenth time as I slid from the exam table.

“No, not for this, but I am going to note that your diabetes needs a firmer regime implemented when you return.” He gave me that I’m-very-serious-here doctor stare.

“Cool, yeah, I’ll work harder on it. And the stress. I promise. I’ll take up yoga.”

I bolted before he could change his mind.

When I returned to the locker room, it was empty. I undressed in silence, flung my gear into my cubicle, and pulled on my street clothes.

I took a second to go to the whiteboard on the wall. Using the sleeve of my Railers hoodie, I wiped off theX’sandO’sto writeSORRY FOR BEING A SPANK– GUNNY,under which, I drew a big old dick with an arrow leading from Gunny to the penis.

On the way home, I stopped to grab a milkshake at the ice cream shop and sat in the car staring at it, knowing I would pay for the indulgence. I drove home, headed for the back entrance, as the press milled around outside the front doors, and rode up to my floor sucking on my shake. Mm, mint chocolate. A chip got stuck in the straw, so I had to suck super hard as I padded down the hall.

As I fumbled with my keys, the one bright spark of the day was knowing that I could now go with Brody to the doctor. We’d have to go incognito to avoid the crush of nosy paparazzi, but at least we’d be hand-in-hand.

I threw the door open, stepped inside while looking for Brody, and tripped over a suitcase. I nearly dropped my shake as I shouted in surprise. Brody came jogging out of the bathroom, shaving cream on his cheeks, and stared at me as if Lucifer had just strolled into the apartment.

“Noah,” he coughed out, wiping at his face with the hand towel resting on his shoulder.

I stared at the suitcase to make sure I wasn’t hallucinating from the sugar rush. I tapped it with the toe of my sneaker. Nope, it was no visual disturbance. It was a packed bag.

I glanced up from the bag to him. “You weren’t going to talk to the doctor at all, were you? You’re going to the hospital today. Fucking hell, Brody! Were you even going to tell me? I thought we were doing this together!”

“I didn’t want to say goodbye,” he whispered, shamed, as he should fucking be.

“So you just were going to sneak off, go under the knife, and not let me know?! Fuck, what kind of miserable snake shit is that? I can’tbelieveyou!”

I slammed my shake to the coffee table. The cup crinkled on impact, melted ice cream oozing out of the straw as I glared at the shake.

“Noah…”

I drew in a wobbly breath, sat down with a huff, and buried my face in my hands.

“Today is officially the worst day in a string of miserable days,” I said into my palms.

“I was going to have Logan call you when it was done,” he said as he sat beside me on the sofa. “He would have filled you in if things went well.”

I jerked my head from my hands to power glare at him. “And if things went wrong?”

“Then, I wouldn’t have had to say goodbye.”

“Coward,” I snarled, tears forming. I swiped at my eyes with the back of my hands. “How dare you make that decision for me?! We’re boyfriends, Brody. Do you know what that means?!”

“No, I honestly don’t. I have no idea how to do this relationship-with-a-man thing.” His dark eyes were glued to me, dewy as mine were. “I thought I could spare you the grief of looking at my corpse.”

“Maybe I want to see your corpse!” I fired back, then realized how awful that sounded. His eyes rounded. “Not like that. Shit, I am all over the place today. You’re making me nuts, Brody. Truly and astronomically bonkers! I yelled at Blake, took a swing at Cap, and was put on the IR list for a week to get my ‘shit together.’ Then I came home to find out that my supposed boyfriend was going to sneak off to get his brain operated on without telling me. Fucking fuck of all the fucks!”

I grabbed my shake, tore the lid off, and downed the rest of the warm shake in two shuddering gulps. Who needed booze when sugar would get a man buzzing?

“Noah, why the hell are you drinking a milkshake? Your sugar is going to?—”

“Nope!” I poked a finger at his noble nose. “Fuck off,” I snarled, then burped. “Maybe I’ll go find some candy to chase down the ice cream. Then, I’ll hide somewhere and go into a coma, but you won’t know because we didn’t love each other enough to be totally fucking honest with each other.”

He stared at me as if I’d slapped him. “Yeah, okay, I get it. I get it.”

“Do you? Do you really? Because I’m really mad at you for this stunt. If you ever do something this selfish again, I will… I’ll… I don’t know what I’ll do, but it will be stupid. Just like that.” I waved a quaking hand at his suitcase.

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