Page 18 of Always You

I want to email Harper and tell her what I’d done.

I could do this.

I rapped my knuckles on the jamb, and Alex half fell off his chair in shock. Then, he scrambled to his feet, a mix of embarrassment and surprise painting his face as he steadied himself against the desk. Alex, recovering, ran a hand through his hair, smoothing it back. “Jazz, you just… I didn’t hear you come in,” he stammered, then cleared his throat, trying to regain some of his usual composure.

I leaned against the doorframe, feeling the weight of my decision. “I can find Marcus to help,” I began, but he dismissed that notion with a wave of his hand.

“What do you need?”

“If it’s okay with you,” I began, my gaze drifting past him to the computer screen that now displayed a Guardian Hall screensaver. “I need to email my daughter. Tell her what I’ve decided.” I stopped.

Alex’s eyes widened. “Are you leaving?” His hand went to his chest and pressed over his heart.

“No, I’m going to give this a chance.”

Alex’s expression shifted from surprise to something softer, more understanding. “Then, you should tell her,” he said, moving aside. “Do you have an email account?”

“Yeah.”

He leaned over and logged out of the office system, then rebooted the computer, going into a new profile with my name.

“I set your password as Tuesday—the day you arrived, but please go in and change it so you have something private. Okay? It should prompt you.”

I settled into the chair Alex had vacated, my fingers hovering over the keyboard.

Alex hovered for a moment, unsure whether to leave me alone or stay. “If you need anything…” he offered.

I glanced up, meeting his gaze. “I think I’m okay for now.”

With a nod, Alex left me to it, the softclickof the door signaling that I was alone with my thoughts, my decision, and the email to Harper that felt like the first step to somewhere.

How did I start?Dear Harper, Today, I chose a different path.It seemed too grandiose, too unlike me. Yet, as I typed, the words came easier than I expected. Even though it wasn’t a long email, by the time I signed off withLove Dad, I’d said enough to let her know where I was and that I was safe.

I typed in her email address, and my mouse pointer hovered over the send option. One click of the mouse, and it would be gone.

I froze.

I closed my eyes as if that would make it easier, but all I saw then were those awful, terrible things I’d tried to forget—the things that had cut away at my soul.

For a moment, I considered deleting what I’d written.

For a moment, I wanted to cry.

“Coffee and cake,” Marcus shouted through the door. “In the kitchen, when you’re ready.”

His voice jerked me out of my funk.

And with a deep breath, I pressed send.

Chapter Ten

Alex

Ten days.

Jazz had been at Guardian Hall for ten days, and each day felt as if it were a delicate balance between me giving him his space but being there if he needed support. He’d used the computer twice when I was in the office, but of course, I didn’t stay because he needed his privacy. I caught him smiling yesterday as he read a long email, and I assumed it was from his daughter. The smile didn’t last all day, but he seemed lighter. I wished we were brave enough to at least look at each other, but he still wouldn’t meet my gaze. I wasn’t sure whether it was Jazz avoiding connecting with me, or if I was the one avoiding him.

You don’t want to pull me back into your life, Alex.

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