Page 62 of Worth the Risk

His jaw slackened, and pure shock blazed in his eyes. ‘Jesus, you have a set of balls on you, don’t you?’

I shrugged. ‘I seem to recall us agreeing to call it like it was. What are you going to do about it?’

He continued to stare at me for another handful of seconds. Then his expression chilled. ‘Is this some sort of challenge? What? You’ve dealt with your issues so I need to deal with mine?’

‘It’s a simple observation that you’re sucking at remaining as emotionally detached as you want to be. It’s a recommendation that you deal with it instead of exploding it all over me.’ Something inside me cracked at the bleak look that shifted in his eyes. ‘It’s also an offer to—’

He shook his head in a firm refusal. ‘If you’re about to put yourself up as my shrink, then no, thanks. I have enough people in my life who think they know what’s best for me. Like you said, you’re here for now. I’m sure neither of us wants to delude ourselves that trust and dependency are part of this deal.’ The way he uttered those two words stung. I barely managed to hide my flinch. ‘But since I crave the role you’ve carved out for yourself in my life, for now, I’ll learn to compartmentalise better so I don’t...explode it all over you. Does that work for you, Leonora?’

I curled my hands into fists, knowing in part I’d brought this upon myself by challenging him in one breath, then offering to help heal him in the other. For all I knew he didn’t want to get over what had happened.

By pushing him, was I recklessly risking what little time we had?

My heart lurched. ‘Fine,’ I replied through numb lips.

He stared at me for another fistful of heartbeats. Then he sighed. ‘I sense that I’ve blown my chances of fucking you, for the time being. So shall we go to dinner? Or is that off the table, too?’

I forced myself not to glance at the bed. ‘Dinner is fine.’

Dinner wasn’t fine. It was stilted and tense. Right up until he set his glass down with a definitive click and speared me with sombre eyes.

‘Contrary to what you think, I’m not attempting to avoid my issues. My phone call to my office today was to confirm my attendance at a board meeting I don’t particularly want to attend. I was getting stick for not committing to attending in person. Normally, I would’ve told them where to get off. But the call took longer because I was attempting reason with irrational people. It’s the most peculiar thing, this new giving-a-shit business. I’m not sure what the fuck it is you’ve done to me. And right now, I’m not entirely sure I like it.’

My heart stuttered. ‘Are you saying—’

He stopped me with a finger on my mouth. ‘I may have attempted to take a leaf out of your book, but regardless that, I’ve bared myself more to you in the last few days than I’ve done with anyone else for a long time, I don’t deal in blind trust.’

‘That’s fair enough. Trust is earned in my book, too.’

He exhaled with what sounded like a little relief. ‘Okay, and if...if you want me to throttle back in other areas, too, then I’ll try to oblige.’

Sex.He meant sex. Did I want him to throttle back? God, no. Our exchange in his cabin had left me with the sensation that I was already losing ground where Gideon was concerned. Ground I didn’t even know I wanted. If sex was all I had...

This time my heart stuttered for a different reason. ‘What if I don’t want you to throttle back? What if I want more?’

For the longest time he stared, unsmiling, at me. Then his gaze turned stormy. ‘Then I’ll say be very careful what you wish for. You might just get it.’

We went to bed with residual tension still lingering. No matter how much I tried, I couldn’t dispel the notion that something between us had changed. Something irrevocable.

When I next opened my eyes, the space beside me was empty. At some point in the night, we’d docked in St Tropez. Half of the crew were on board, the other half on shore, restocking supplies. I knew Gideon’s standing privacy directive meant I wouldn’t be spotted when I shrugged on his shirt and left the master suite.

The door to his office was ajar and I spotted him behind his desk. Although he stared at a bunch of papers in his hand, his gaze was off.

I leaned in the doorway, my heart thudding louder as the sheer impact of him hit me sideways. His head snapped up, his gaze locking onto me.

‘Gideon...’

‘We have company for dinner tonight,’ he said.

‘We?’

He turned to face me, one eyebrow lifting. ‘Yes. We.’

I couldn’t bring myself to ask if my inclusion was in the capacity of his lover or merely business-wise so I nodded. ‘We should be all stocked by then. How many guests are you expecting?’

‘Not guests. My cousin Gemma and her husband. You’ll be meeting them as you, Leonora, not as the badass businesswoman you’re attempting to hide behind.’

‘I’m not hiding,’ I replied briskly, ‘but if you want me to join you, you should ask me properly.’

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