Page 62 of Close to the Edge

Despite being more than a little rattled that I’d also experienced the soundest, nightmare-free sleep in years. The jagged, heart-pounding images that usually taunted me with how I failed to save my mother were so inherent I’d accepted their presence.

Last night they didn’t materialize. It was disturbing to even consider that Lily had anything to do with it. That something as simple as sharing bits of our past with each other had achieved this result.

It was absurd, right?

Unbidden, other moments filtered through—her pain during our first lunch in the restaurant. Her tears when she told me about her stepfather. Exposing her vulnerability at the possibility of one of her team sabotaging her work.

After the sort of childhood Lily had experienced, many people would’ve cut their families out of their lives and closed themselves off.

I was surprised she hadn’t.

Stephen Gracen parked himself on his favorite bar stool in his favorite Irish pub most days before noon and stayed till closing, his tab settled courtesy of the money he’d made off his stepdaughter’s talent. The guy I sent to Boston to check him out had reported that while Gracen hadn’t exactly talked trash about Lily, he hadn’t been complimentary, either.

Gracen was either too bitter or too stupid to realize the gem he had in his stepdaughter.

I’d met several Silicon Valley types who thought they were hot shit because they could string code together that baffled the common man.

In the past few days I’d discovered that Lily, despite being a highly intelligent woman who was mostly likely being paid millions for her professional skills, wasn’t in any way a pampered princess.

She was caring and considerate.

And she’d shared her deepest pain with me.

Scattered across several events, they’d seemed minor but put together they were huge. Put-your-trust-in-another-person huge.

When was I remotely okay with being that guy?

I eyed the bedroom door, wondering again why I wasn’t hightailing out of it.

Because you want the same from her.

The sharp ache in my chest answered the inner voice.

I shifted again, uncomfortable at the fresh turmoil churning inside me.

This was why I didn’t do feelings. So far, every encounter between us had come packed with them, even the moments she’d accepted my help to ease her stress sexually. They were all emotional land mines that usually had pushed my eject button.

I gritted my teeth. I liked her. A hell of a lot. But feelings and fucking didn’t mix well. Period.

She stirred against me. I looked down and saw her watching me with contemplative eyes. It was that same look she’d given me before prying secrets from me yesterday in the car.

“You look seriously...serious.” Wary questions lurked in her eyes, traces of unease and all those pitfalls I suspected came with the morning after a night of earth-shattering sex.

“For a genius, I expected more eloquence thanseriously serious.” I kept my voice light.

Her hand drifted up my waist to my chest even though her eyes remained dark, searching. “Okay, how about this.” Her thigh brushed my hard-on. “Is that one of my sex toys in your lap or are you just extremely happy to see me?”

Sex. This I could handle.

Talking about my mother and how I would have her back in a heartbeat, if only for a chance to do things differently, push harder, shout louder until my voice was heard, until she got the help she needed, I most definitely couldn’t.

I smiled past my disquiet, willing my emotions to detach again as I rolled her over and slid two fingers beneath the choker we never got round to taking off last night. “In case I need to spell it out, your battery-operated boyfriends have had their privileges revoked for the foreseeable future. I’m taking care of your every need from now on.”

The words echoed with an unnerving sense of permanence, sending another spike of unease up my spine.

Something flitted through her eyes before her lids swept down, cutting me off from her expression. When she looked back up, her eyes contained nothing but hot sexual promise. “If it’s going to be anywhere near as good as last night...”

I brushed my lips over hers, teasing even though I wanted to plunge in and devour. “That better not be a challenge, baby. Or I’ll be forced to give you a demonstration.”