Page 57 of Journey to Love

"Yeah, sure," Lana replies, trailing behind me. "Maybe you could talk to Jacob about it? He might help."

I shake my head, feeling irritation creeping in. "No, I doubt he's even awake yet or probably busy with work."

The thought of discussing my nightmares with Jacob only adds to my frustration. Right now, I just want to push everything aside and focus on getting through the day.

“Well I know he has a way of –”

“I SAID NO LANA!” I shout, my words echoing in the quiet kitchen. Instantly, guilt washes over me, and I take a deep breath as I pour my coffee. “I’m sorry, I just feel bad unleashing all this baggage on him. I can deal with this myself, okay?”

Lana bows her head, her voice softening as she speaks. “I’m sorry for pushing, I just wanted to help.”

Her apology only deepens my sense of guilt. This is precisely why I've learned to keep my past to myself. People always want to help, but they can't fix what's broken inside me. I have to figure out how to deal with it on my own, without dragging others down with me. Today, I'll focus on getting through work, finishing college, and making a better life for myself. Tomorrow's Anya can worry about Paul and all the judgmental people. Right now, I just need to make today a good day.

I can't help but chuckle at my sudden switch to third-person narration. Today's gonna be alright.

*buzz*

JACOB: Good morning, I hope you have a great day beautiful!

ANYA: Good morning! Thank you!

JACOB: How did you sleep?

ANYA: I slept okay, we went to bed pretty late lol. How about you?

JACOB: I slept great, I was dreaming about this beautiful brown haired, brown eyed girl??

ANYA: *eye roll* such a smooth talker lol

JACOB: I never said it was about you lol

ANYA: oh well in that case never mind then lol I see how much you think about your girlfriend??

JACOB: lol I’m just joking babe, of course I was dreaming of you.

ANYA: Oh no, now I don’t believe you

JACOB: Wait? Really? Anya I was just kidding

ANYA: Nope…

JACOB: ANYA! Seriously, I was just kidding!!!

ANYA: LOL!! I’m just messing with you.

JACOB: *sends a phew gif*

JACOB: I thought you were actually mad lol

ANYA: That would be a silly thing to be mad over lol

ANYA: Anyway, sorry to cut it short but I gotta go work now.

JACOB: Okay babe, talk to you later!

ANYA: Okay bye!

Work felt like a never-ending slog, and the lunch crowd was just as dull as yesterday, so my tips barely covered the gas for my car. I managed to plow through my classwork, realizing I'm just a couple of months away from finally snagging my degree. It's a thought that fills me with both relief and anticipation. Living with my grandparents has been a lifesaver in many ways, but lately, I've started to feel like a burden on them. However, the idea of going back to my parents' house is out of the question. Living there feels like being trapped in a cage, suffocating under their suffocating expectations. They claim they understand, but deep down, I know they don't—not really. After wrapping up my laptop, I mindlessly scroll through my social media feeds, not really paying attention to anything in particular. That's when a text message pops up:

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