Page 54 of Journey to Love

As Lana's worried gaze meets mine, I nod in response before slipping into the cooler. The rush of cold air envelopes me, providing a momentary respite from the whirlwind of emotions inside.

Inhaling deeply, I feel the frosty air calm my racing heart, yet my mind continues to race with doubts. Can I really face him? Can I handle whatever he might say? The fear of confrontation gnaws at me, but I refuse to succumb.

"No," I tell myself firmly. "You've got this. It's time to stop living in fear." Reminding myself that I'm safe here, surrounded by coworkers, I gather my courage.

With resolve building within me, I take a final deep breath and stride back to the table. Lana's supportive glance spurs me on as I approach, ready to confront whatever lies ahead.

"Good evening. My name is Anya, and I’ll be your server tonight. What can I get ya’ll to drink?" I manage to say, masking my nerves with a veneer of confidence.

"Anya?" Marcus's voice jolts me, and I force a smile. "I thought that was you! How the hell are you, girl?" he adds with a grin.

Keeping up my best customer service smile, I reply, "Hi! I'm doing well, what can I get you?" I keep the smile fixed in place, determined not to let him see my anxiety.

Marcus throws his hands up and laughs, "Right, right, you're busy. I'll just have a coke, darlin'." His wide smile doesn't ease my tension. I quickly jot down the rest of the tables' drink orders and hurry to the furthest computer, exhaling deeply.

Lana appears at my side, concern evident in her eyes. "You okay?" she asks.

I nod, hastily punching in the drink order. As much as I want to linger and talk to Lana, my priority is getting Marcus's order and getting him out of here as quickly as possible.

I return to the table with the drinks, feeling Marcus's intense gaze on me, his smile sending shivers down my spine. "So, Anya, what have you been up to these last two years?" he says, his tone dripping with something unsettling.

"Just been working and finishing my degree," I reply with a polite yet nervous smile, trying to maintain my composure.

He continues to stare at me, his grin unwavering. "Cool, cool. You ever get rid of that lemon of a car you had?" he jokes, and I shoot him a glare.

"You mean the one you crashed, and the mechanic couldn’t fix properly because you're good for nothing..." I catch myself before saying too much, taking a deep breath to compose myself. Then, with a forced smile, I continue, "You know, it's in the past. So, to answer your question, yes, I got a new car." I offer another smile, hoping to steer the conversation away from uncomfortable territory. "Now, are you folks ready to order, or do you still need a few moments?" I inquire, eager to move on from the exchange.

As Marcus laughs and places his order, along with the rest of his group, I try to maintain my professional demeanor. But then, just as I'm about to walk away, he drops a bombshell.

"Paul says hi, by the way," he casually remarks, his mischievous smile sending a wave of panic through me.

I close my eyes briefly, reminding myself to stay calm. When I turn back to face him, I force myself to maintain a composed expression. "I'm sorry? What did you say?" I inquire, my voice steady despite the turmoil inside.

"I told Paul that I saw you a few weeks ago, and he said to tell you he says hi," Marcus replies, his smile growing even wider.

I glance around, checking if anyone is paying attention, before stepping closer and leaning in toward Marcus. "Well, you can tell Paul that he can go fuck himself, and I hope he burns in hell for all the shit he put me through," I hiss, the words dripping with venom.

Marcus's expression shifts from amusement to shock, but it quickly morphs back into a smile. "Oh, come on, mamacita, it wasn't all bad," he says, using the nickname that sends a shiver down my spine.

That name brings back memories I'd rather forget, memories of Paul, a time when I was trapped in a cycle of abuse. They gave me that nickname when Paul "accidentally" got me pregnant. But I know it was no accident. And thankfully, I lost the baby a few weeks later.

It might be shitty of me to say such things about a potential child, but I couldn't bear the thought of being tied to Paul forever through a child. No one believed me when I tried to speak out about the abuse, so I know they wouldn't have believed me if I had tried to keep him away, had the baby survived. So, I made the painful decision to let go of that part of my life and move on, determined to break free from his hold on me.

Standing tall, I address Marcus directly. "You know what, Marcus? All I can say to you is that I hope no woman in your life, whom you hold dear, ever goes through what Paul did to me." With those words hanging in the air, I pivot and stride away, keeping my head held high despite the tremors running through me.

Arriving at the safety of the computer, hidden behind a wall, I notice my hands shaking uncontrollably. I clench them tightly, willing the tremors to subside. Lana must have seen the panic on my face because she rushes over to me.

"What happened?" she asks, her concern evident in her voice. Shaking, I recount the entire conversation to her.

"That's it, fuck this job!" Lana exclaims, rolling up her sleeves in readiness. "I'm gonna fucking beat the living shit out of him!" Before she can storm off towards Marcus, I grab her arm firmly.

"No, Lana, he's not worth the trouble... trust me," I implore, trying to reason with her.

"Come on! I can take him!" Lana protests, her determination clear in her eyes.

I chuckle, shaking my head. "I'm sure you can, and I appreciate the gesture, but don't worry about Marcus. He's all talk, no bite," I assure her with a smirk.

Lana sighs, relenting. "Fine. But I get to beat up Paul then," she retorts, her defiance softened by a hint of humor.