Page 49 of Dying to Meet You

Blaine looks on with his arms crossed and eyebrows raised. I’m waiting for him to chime in. Even though Blaine is capable of watching the kids, I keep an eye on them as they move closer to the animal pen. Looking back at Becca, I say, “Is that a good idea? I mean, aren’t you scared he’ll come back?”

I’m not a pushy person. In most matters I’d prefer everyone gets along. It feels presumptuous to tell a new friend how they should handle a situation, but she’s been hurt. “When did this happen?” I take the offered meal from her saying thanks. It’s hard to give my full attention to her as I look around to make sure the kids are close by.

Blaine mouths, “What the fuck, dude” before catching sight of Warner trying to climb onto a bucket. He moves in swiftly to stop him as I turn back to her. “Becca, as a friend, I’m telling you anyone capable of doing that to you will do it again. Or worse.”

For several minutes, she gives me the history of her and the man who won’t let her move on. I’d be lying if I said I’m listening closely. My eyes are still tracking the kids while I try to keep my emotions in check. The pain of Weston not being here is overshadowing every thought, every action.

I nod as she goes on, but I’m being a terrible friend not staying engaged. She gets my attention, stepping closer and putting her hand on my arm. “I’m sorry. I came over to bring your family something to eat and tell you I’m always available if you need to talk. But instead, you’re the one listening to me.” She gives me a shaky smile. “Everyone at church has been praying for your little boy.”

She envelops my hand between her own. “Can I offer a prayer right now?” A part of me is resigned to it, and another part of me is taken aback she is thinking of me when she has other obvious problems.

“Thank you.” I try to clear the lump from my throat. “I’ve never needed God’s guidance more.

With lowered heads, she says softly, “In Your holy word, You have promised to hear those who cry unto You in their day of trouble. Listen to our cries for mercy and send us help from the sanctuary of Your grace…”

Blaine moves closer to us, Warner on his hip. I hear him mumble, “Not disrespectful at all…”

I don’t know what he’s referring to, but his snarkiness is at an all-time high. Becca says she’ll stop by tomorrow with more food. I miss the comment Blaine says after a huff of a laugh. She doesn’t pay any attention to it. Making sure Blaine sees I’m walking her back to her vehicle, I say, “It was really thoughtful of you to stop by, especially after what you’ve been through.”

“That’s what friends do. You’d do the same for me if you knew I needed you, right?”

It makes me feel even worse I didn’t press harder for her to report what happened between her and her ex. I would’ve a few days ago, but right now I’m on survival mode, praying God hears me.

Blaine gives me a stern look when I return from escorting Becca to her car. “Who and what was that?”

I explain, once again, she is my friend from church. It feels like he willfully ignores me when I tell him things sometimes. “She was part of the search party.”

“Big Gulp.” He sighs, shaking his head at me. “You don’t see it, do you?”

“See what?” Eden peeks out the window. Both Blaine and I turn to see her better. Wearing an old Belmont sweatshirt, a pair of yoga pants, and her hair tied up on top of her head, she looks far younger than her thirty years. Pain is evident in her eyes. When she sees us, she puts her hand on the window, leaning against it and shutting her eyes, her breath fogging the glass.

“If you’re a committed man, you aren’t giving attention to another woman, making another woman feel like she has a chance with you, giving emotional energy to them, or disregarding boundaries. You’re a married man.”

“That’s not fair, I’m committed.” Since when is being a friend to someone of the opposite sex such a problem? I almost remind him; Eden knows I’m committed, but he’s already halfway to the house. I follow, waving for Zach and Zinnea to join us.

I committed to Eden with all my heart and soul, but in return I only have a piece of her. The thought hits me hard. I’ve never doubted she loves me, but maybe, just maybe, her divided attention is starting to bother me.

Chapter Thirty-One

When the problem asks what the problem is

Keir

Thelookofsheerdevastation on Eden’s face when Matt announces the FBI will no longer be investigating Weston’s disappearance kills me.

It drives a stake directly through my heart.

With one look I know she’s thinking about what happened to her brother. So am I.

I’m feeling caught in the middle-pulled in two directions by the two people I’m in love with: Matt’s need to keep a bad element from the FBI away from the investigation and Eden’s need to have as many boots on the ground looking for our son as possible.

“Matt?” Eden’s fist is balled up in his shirt. “Why? Why would you do that?”

He leans toward her, but when he tries to wrap his arms around her, she pulls away. “No! That’s not going to help!”

My brain feels like it’s wrapped in cotton, as if I have to concentrate hard to stay tuned in.

Eden turns to me, stepping close. “Make him understand. Please, please…he doesn’t understand,” she pleads, begging me to intervene. But she doesn’t realize I have no real power to change his decision.

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