Page 40 of Vodka and Chocolate Drops

“But…”

They were handed their milkshakes and burgers. Scott drove toward the edge of the city, where they would take the highway to Blueberry Springs.

“But what?” he finally asked.

“How do I explain doing all of this stuff behind her back?”

“Just tell her.”

They passed a police station near the edge of the city and Amber wondered if it would be the one Scott would be working out of when he transferred. When he left. He hadn’t said anything about an interview. Hadn’t said anything about applying, either.

“I really screwed up, didn’t I?” she said, unwrapping her burger. She was losing so much, so quickly. It was as if she was finding the things she loved best just in time to lose them.

“Be careful,” Scott advised, taking a sip of his milkshake. “Don’t give Delia too much personal information. She’s still a stranger even though we believe she’s your sister.”

“Yeah. Might be too late for that.” Her sister knew where she lived and Amber had opened the door for “pop on by” with her accidental visit today.

Scott’s brow furrowed as he stopped in a line of traffic waiting at a road construction site. He twisted in his seat again, facing her, her body half cocooned by him with his arm across her seat back. Outside, the sun was setting, the spring air giving the green foothills a glow.

“Do you think there’s a chance she’ll come by to check out the town before your mom returns?”

“She is my sister.”

Scott was openly admiring her and Amber wondered what it would be like to allow herself the opportunity to change things between them. What would happen if she gave in to her restless thoughts about him?

She slowly leaned across the console that separated them, watching him carefully. He looked curious, but not at all as if expecting her to graze his lips with hers. She kissed him, almost drawing away before he began reciprocating, his mouth cool and sweet from the milkshake. Heat flooded through Amber, touching areas she hadn’t even known existed. Still kissing, she placed her hands on either side of his mouth, wishing she could climb into his lap and continue this forever.

Just when she thought she’d become lost in him, he broke the kiss, leaning away.

“I thought you wanted this,” she said, trying to ignore the slice of rejection that had cut her open.

Scott was silent for a moment before gently cupping her cheek, caressing it with a rough thumb. “Amber,” he said softly, “you will always be worth waiting for.”

“There’s no wait. I’m right here.” She swallowed hard, uncertain as to why she was crossing the line she had so vigilantly avoided for years, and even more uncertain as to why he was pushing her away. “I’m ready. Ready for this. For us.” Her voice was shaking from the fear ripping through her chest.

“You’re not.”

“I am.” Her voice became soft, her tone begging.

“You’re not ready, Amber, and both you and I know it.”

She stuck out her chin. “I’m ready, Officer Malone.”

He swallowed, his gaze darkening with something she couldn’t identify, but she knew it wasn’t anger. He wanted her, and yet he was saying no.

“I’m not good enough?” She would never be a mayor or a beauty queen or any of the amazing women Scott had dated. But she’d always secretly hoped, way back in the furthest reaches of her mind, that she would be enough for him. She’d been wrong.

“Amber, don’t go down that road.” His eyes were like fire. “You know you’re not ready. I can see it in your eyes.”

“No. I want you.”

“You don’t.” His voice was harsh.

She did. She wanted him. Her best friend. She wanted to fall into his strength and shelter. And that kiss… it had been the beginning of something. Something she’d never felt before. How could he not see that?

“This is too important to mess up,” he said. “When you’re ready we’ll start something good.”

“No.”

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