Page 58 of The Cowboy's Surprise Return

“Are you sure Levi’s in charge of this room?”

“It’s a bit shocking, isn’t it?” Cole said from behind the desk. He was digging through papers, clearly searching for something. “Mom keeps threatening to clean it up, but he fights it every time.”

“It’s a good thing you came home when you did,” Jackie said as she surveyed the room. Levi was typically so anal about details. The office told a story that spoke to the true state of things on the ranch, and how overwhelmed Levi must have been with running things.

“Why’s that?” Cole asked, peering at her with his bright blue eyes.

She gestured to the chaos. “He obviously needs help.”

Cole scanned the room with an encompassing look, then with a sigh, opened a binder and started flipping pages. Moments later he set it down again and began moving stacks of papers on the desk, placing them back where he’d found them.

“If Laura hadn’t come along he’d be completely unbearable,” Jackie commented.

Cole didn’t lift his head. “Why?”

“You know. Firstborn trying to rule the world. Or in this case, the ranch. Stressing out that he was going to lose the entire operation and let the family down. Your dad has very high expectations of him, doesn’t he?”

“Of all of us,” Cole muttered, continuing his search. The brim of his hat hid his expression, but Jackie had a feeling it was tight, with emotion held barely in-check.

“He missed you.” She was wading into uncharted waters, certain there were hazards everywhere she might wander.

“My dad? I doubt that.”

“He did. But Levi especially.”

Cole shifted his attention to the bookshelf, attacking more binders, pulling them out, flipping them open before shoving them back into place. She caught his eyes, dark and stormy, not their usual blue.

“I’ll talk to Levi about the study’s details later,” she said. “Really, there’s no need to ransack the place.”

Cole squeezed the navy blue binder in his grip, his shoulders flexing. “I want to help.”

There was sorrow in his voice and Jackie sank into the chair near the door, disturbing a collection of ball caps. “Cole…”

The binder protested his tight grip, making a strangled squeaking noise before the metal rings bent with a pop. He tossed it onto a pile on the desk, sending things sliding. “Why am I even here?”

“What do you mean?”

“I’ll never fit back into this world.”

“It’ll take time.”

“I did what April needed me to do, and I let everybody else down in the process. That’s not easy to fix.”

“Sometimes we have to do the hard stuff for our family,” she said, fidgeting with her chipped nail polish. Her Valentine’s Day manicure hadn’t lasted long. She should remove it, but somehow couldn’t summon the energy to care. “Even if it’s not what we want to do, or even what’s best for us.”

When she looked up Cole was watching her, the muscles in his jaw flexing.

She got up, moved to him and wrapped her arms around him, letting him know he wasn’t alone, and that she understood.

“Maybe this is why people start their own families.” He curved his body around her, his breath soft in her hair. “It’s like a giant do-over.”

* * *

“Are you really going to leave me?” Cole asked, feeling as though her comment about San Antonio had a ring of truth, a ring of sorrow.

Jackie tipped her head back, still in his arms. In those blue-and-amber-flecked irises he saw pain and worry, loss and uncertainty. He instantly wanted to make it better even though he didn’t know how. He wanted to hold her tighter, not let go.

“I don’t know yet.” She shifted, and he reluctantly released her. “But I may not be in town until the end of May.”

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