Page 86 of Unspoken Truths

CHAPTER15

RACHELLE

Theo doesn’t make any sense to me. He reminds me of a serial killer in a lot of ways with the cold blue eyes sitting behind his glasses, his thick hair making him look extra intense due to how it lays over his forehead. There’s no mistaking him for a cute bookworm after the way he stared intently at my pussy while fisting his cock.

He’s more like someone who killed the neighbor cats and used a magnifying glass to set ants on fire as a child. Of all of the Kings, I think he’s the one who terrifies me the most.

Shaking my head, I walk to the Newspaper Club meeting room, where Liliana is reading in the new members who are joining late. Apparently, it’s difficult to get into this club, and I was able to skip the waitlist because my girlfriend is the editor. Smirking, I listen to her talk from the hallway, killing time until my photographs are dry and I can retrieve them.

It’s not a crime to develop extra photos of Jared Denton on a promise I made to Calvin, right?

I’m trying to stay busy, because the intrusive thoughts are still present in my mind. Barrett and I discussed if medication may be necessary, but he thinks it’s situational due to intense stress. So, we’re going to play it by ear, and I’m going to find things that bring me joy.

Doing nice things for people is one of those.

Blowing out a breath, I pull my backpack off to text Liliana that I’m going to go up to the tower. Now that classes are over, I can have my phone with me again. I don’t have many people I’d be texting either way, so this isn’t a big deal for me.

Me:

I need to kill some time. I’ll be at the tower if you’re done before my photos are dry.

Glancing into the window,I watch as Lili glances at the screen and smiles before continuing to speak. Content that she knows where I’ll be, I sling my backpack over my shoulders and begin walking.

I’m not dumb, I know everyone is worried after my freak out yesterday. Everything felt like I was trudging through deep sludge. It was exhausting, and everything felt too difficult to deal with. The memories of my mom giving me a hug when I ended my appointment will live with me forever.

I don’t want to be like this. I can’t do things I used to when I needed to quiet my mind, so I need to choose joy. How do you do that when you’ve been less than a person for so long, simply drifting through life?

I gave up everything when my dad died, all interests, because everything was so expensive. It’s difficult to imagine what makes me happy, outside of being under a wide open sky. Since Emil hasn’t found the people who tried to mow us down with their car and shoot at us, the tower is the best option.

Trudging up the stairs has me huffing once I get to the top, making me roll my eyes. I really need to do something to get into better shape. Grabbing my phone, I shoot off another text to Lili.

Me:

After the stairs attempted to take me out because my lungs are seizing, I’ve decided to take you up on torturing me.

Lili:

Let’s take baby steps. We’ll start with a jog tomorrow before we move into an all out run.

Smirking,I nod, putting my phone away before letting my bag drop to the floor. Walking toward the open window, I gaze out at the sky. It’s a really pretty day, and I remind myself that just because it’s different, it doesn’t mean it’s bad. I've had to tell myself this about a lot in the last few months.

It’s hard to believe I’ve been in Portland for three months, here we are.

“Why are you alone?” Ignacio asks gruffly, joining me at the window. The Kings are all ninjas, I’m convinced. I didn’t hear a single footstep.

“Taking a time out,” I murmur. “Theo interrupted me while I was developing film, so I’m here to just be.”

“He’s a little intense, huh?” he teases me.

“Ignacio, intense is an understatement,” I complain, though I’m sure it could have been worse.

At least he kept his hands to himself. Turning, I try to pull myself up to sit in the large window space, huffing when I have to jump to get up. Ignacio sighs, showing me his hands as he wraps them around my waist and lifts me effortlessly.

“Don’t fall out the damn window,” he mutters. “Weren’t you in the dark room for like an hour?”

“Are you keeping tabs on me?” I ask before rolling my eyes. “Of course you are.”

Crossing my legs underneath me, I turn my body so I can lean against the cool stone. This way I can talk to Ignacio and still look out at the world. I guess I can handle him being here as long as I have this.

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