Page 16 of Drill Session

“Wouldn’t you rather I told you?”

“It’s not a preference because you show me. You ought to know by now, I prefer actions over words. Talk is cheap and it don’t mean shit.”

Now the lines were blurred between us.

An anchor was weighing me down, but I fought the battle to stay afloat, despite his street talk. That’s what bothered me the most. He was a street nigga by heart and often spoke street code with me, making the lines blurry. Instead of killing the mood, I continued my stride, hand in hand, we led the way to our future. I’d hope to think this trip would lead to us confessing our feelings for one another. That’s the point in coming, because I wanted something serene, and the breath of fresh air is something we both need.

“What’s that over there?” I pointed ahead of us. “Oh wow,” I gushed. I didn’t know they did things like this out here. Jalisa didn’t mention anything about this. I see these type of things on TikTok all the time. Drill that’s beautiful!”

A few feet away sat a table set for two, a pristine white tablecloth adorned with silverware and wine glasses, ready for a special meal. An extravagant display of roses led the way, each bloom illuminated by the gentle light of the tealight candles. I could only see a portion, but it appeared that twelve dozen roses filled each vase behind the candles, their color a vibrant blur. The roses led to the table and a few feet away from the table was a rose shaped heart. It was so breathtaking and whoever planned this dinner would have the time of their lives tonight.

“Akira,” Drill switched my attention to him, away from the setting. “I need you to understand something. I’m a man first and a sucker for you immediately. I need you to walk with me baby and show me how to love you, show me how to treat you. Your body sends signals that I can't ignore. Forgive me for being cocky, but I got that figured out already. I know what I want and when it comes to you, I don’t um—” he cleared his throat and looked around as if there was an audience watching him. His nervousness seeped through him and came onto me like a wavelength, giving me all that energy. Out of nowhere, I felt my stomach hollow, and it felt like my heart was about to burst again. Being cultivated in Drill’s world makes me nervous. Taking it to the next level with him or the thought makes my knees weak. There isn’t a doubt in my mind that halts me from thinking he isn’t the man for me.

To ease his nerves, I reached up and caressed his cheek. Before continuing to speak, he placed his hand over mine and kissed it, then cleared his throat again. “I need you to allow me grace, while I figure this out. This relationship shit is all new to me and I know that’s what you want, but I need you to allow me some time baby. I’m a street nigga with a street mind set and I want to be the man for you when the time comes.”

Our eyes played ping pong for a millisecond before I broke the stare to dart my eyes elsewhere before landing them back on him. The heat between us was scorching hot and I needed to breathe.

“So, w-what do you want me to do Drill? Wait for you?” I stammered.

“Time is a virtue.” He nodded.

My mouth felt dry, like cotton. I pursed my lips to close my mouth shut for lubrication. He wasn’t asking for much and I couldn’t be selfish because if that’s what he wanted me to do, then there was no harm in doing that. I could do it for a while, but how long does one consider a while?

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, inhaling the misty air. With a slight head nod, he asked me if, I was sure. “I’m sure.”

“The last thing I’ll do is hurt you, Akira,” he mumbled gently. Concern was deeply washed over his handsome face.

“How long Drill? How long do I have to wait?”

Like I did earlier, he tore his gaze away from me and looked elsewhere, as if the answer was etched in the air.

“What is there to decipher, if in your heart you know that you want me?”

Like a magnet, his attention drew towards me. His hand met the cusp of my chin as he gently stroked it with the tip of his thumb, being careful not to smear my makeup.

“I don’t want to reveal the truth to you. I’m too afraid of what you’ll think of me. Akira having a nigga like me in rare form is scary, baby. I don’t know—” Pausing his words, he released my chin and put his fist to his mouth. Frustration was driving him crazy, because he couldn’t find the words to define his feelings or maybe he didn’t want to. Maybe he was holding back. Maybe he was deflecting, because that’s what men do… it’s a curse that men were born with.

“Drill,” I called him back to life.

“C’mere.” He grabbed my hand and we latched together again.

A tingling feeling started at my toes, then swarmed up my body, passing through the butterflies fluttering around in my stomach and lit a match to my fire. I felt a sting, causing me to see tears. My nails scratched through my delicate skin, and I clawed through my flesh as if I could grab my heart to cool it down. Reality sank deep when I noticed the surprise was for me. This was the gift from him to me and it felt so right, engulfed in this and experiencing this with him. Once again, those blurred lines were becoming noticeable because how can Drill expect for me not to want anything more with him, if this is what I have to look forward to? Despite the urge to stammer on his words from defining his feelings, I want this, but I refuse to accept anything less than what I deserve. I guess, for now this was a start for the both of us. My heart said a heavy prayer that only my mind could understand, and I strode along, wrapped in his lust and around his chocolate finger.

“This is beautiful. How’d you manage to pull this off.” I smiled as I reached for the woven rattan, patio garden chair. Drill slapped my hand out the way, with a scowl etched on his handsome face.

“Stop fuckin’ testin’ me. You don’t reach for doors when you’re with me. Any man who graces your presence should open doors for you and treat you like a fuckin’ queen…a sexy ass fuckin’ Princess. Do you understand?”

“Yes sir.” I was already seated, so I craned my neck to look into his eyes and submit. “I understand.”

Two handsome gentleman walked over to us wearing chef’s attire with our plates, covered with lids. My stomach growled because I could smell it before they removed the lid.

“For the lovely lady, and for the gentleman.” They placed our plates in front of us and bowed. “As requested, Mr. Washington, we have your wine of choice.” My preferred wine, Cooper's Hawk, was chilled in a bucket of ice. Drill didn’t care for the bitter taste. Matter of fact, he’d say I over hyped it, but my mama put me on to this wine many years ago and I’ve been a fan of it ever since. That product is unavailable in Memphis; therefore, I typically place large orders through an alternative vendor. Following my request, a surf and turf dinner, complete with garlic mashed potatoes was provided, seemingly fulfilling an unspoken expectation. Drill ate like a man, a Tomahawk steak, mashed potatoes and asparagus and grilled shrimp would please his appetite.

“Drill,” I sighed. “This is all too much. How did you do this?”

“Do you have to know everything?” His brow rose. He didn’t wait for an answer; he grabbed a Tupperware knife and fork to cut his steak.

“I don’t,” I replied, with a giggle. “But this is so pretty. How did I not notice this set up when we drove past them earlier?”

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