Page 492 of Kingdoms of Night

I swirled the cinnamon-dusted rice pudding, hunger long given way to speedy digestion despite the varied selection. “I still don’t quite grasp how you came to be. You said your father was mortal?”

“He was the king of a city-state in what is now Beinahrein, among the first to elevate my mother to a head goddess after winning her favor,” he said. “I believe he carved the Cedar Altar for her.”

Intrigued, I pulled the spoon from my mouth. “How did he win her favor?”

“He and the king of a rival city brought her offerings when she descended from heaven, and Ashtara preferred the precious cuts of ox meat he brought her over the vegetables the other offered.”

Why did this sound so familiar? “Did the rival then declare war?”

“Idiotically, yes, forgetting my mother was among the gods of war. Azaia was cursed to be torn apart by his own people, allowing my father to conquer their city, and be taken as her earthly husband.”

“Bull of Heaven,” I swore, in awe. “Your father was Adonais, the founder of Bab-Elani. We mourn his death in the winter and celebrate his rebirth in spring, to mark his ascension from the underworld to heaven!”

“I’m aware. I partook in a few festivals before I left the Earth for the Moon.”

Fascination had me almost forget the food. “How could the goddess that couldn’t part with her mortal lover be the same who usurps her mother and curses her son? Where did that powerful love go?”

Tamuz clenched his fists, fingers unable to curl all the way in from his talons. “It was never love, but ownership. She went into the underworld and demanded he be returned to her because she wanted to place him in heaven as her servant, not considering that she could be denied. Once it became clear that it was too much of an effort, she left him where he was.”

Disappointed, I traded the last spoonful for water. “So, he doesn’t usher in the seasons?”

“That is pure myth, created once he was deified by the city.” He turned out his palm, as if in presentation. “You’ll find other parts of your empire don’t acknowledge him for a reason.”

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to drudge up upsetting memories.”

“It was a long time ago, and I am far used to the mortals passing, and leaving us behind to mourn.”

“Us?”

He nodded. “Once in a mortal lifetime, my grandmother chose a consort to marry til the end of his life. It was what my mother did, til she married Sharar, residing with him in the heavens as the Morning and Evening Star.”

I gulped, appetite squashed by the topic. “Will I be that for you?”

“Unless you’d desire otherwise, yes.”

It was far too big of a suggestion for me to form a definite answer to. Mere days ago, I had no protest to my tumble off the tower, and now I held on for the cause he had presented to me. Could I even fathom such an option when the thought of touching unseen parts of my husband set my heart abuzz?

“Do you want me to?” I managed to ask, caught up in retreading his kindred disillusion with life. To give him hope then leave as Mahala’s consorts did, that would be a brutal experience. But he would do as his grandmother did, take on another.

“To remain eternally before we have a sign of forever being achievable—to either of us—that would be an irresponsible decision to make,” he said, choked up.

Overcome with a sense of immediacy, I decided to waste no more of our time. I came to his side and reached for his mask.

He jerked back. “What are you doing?”

I shushed him. “Show me.”

He began to object, but I touched his neck, silencing him. “Please,” I begged. “Let me see.”

A gasp escaped him as I trailed my touch up his bobbing throat and reached the edges of his mask. Not giving hesitation a chance, I unmasked him with an eager force, sending the silver barrier flying across the table.

Nothingness gazed back at me, unsettling yet consuming, beckoning me closer like the mouth of a cave.

Strangely soothing, his voice emerged from the dark depths, unfiltered and flowing over me like a spring night breeze. “This is why I need to wear it.”

“I’m not going to lie, it is a little scary to speak to a faceless being.” I ventured into uncharted territory and I brushed his jawline and grazed a rough layer. “Oh.”

“What is it?”

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