Page 31 of Cats and Dogs

Chapter 14

The Heart

Ian was annoying; not only did he cook a million times better than she, but he also didn’t leave a mess, which meant that she had nothing to do with her hands after fleeing to the kitchen. Maybe she could grab an onion and starting cutting it, just to explain why her eyes were getting a little watery.

"Hey."

She turned to find her Alpha female standing behind her, rocking her baby in her arms.

"You know you don't have to hide it, right?"

"Hide what?" Christine asked, genuinely confused.

"Pain. Grief."

Ace opened the glass door leading outside and stepped out. When Christine followed, the Alpha female closed the door behind them. This was as close as they ever got to privacy in the pride house, although the others could probably still hear them if they focused.

"I suck at talking, I prefer punching stuff."

Christine laughed. What else was new?

"Let me try, anyway. When I was little - I don't even know what age - my mother died. I didn't know how to deal with it. I'd never learned what grief was and I was alone. Then, my father stepped in. I couldn't understand a word he said, I had no clue what his gestures meant, but as I clawed at him, drawing blood, he just held me. Petted me. That's something I told myself I didn't need, for a long time. But there's a reason why I didn't kick you all out of here when you turned up on my doorstep. I do need it, your support. The animal inside me craved this community. To have someone to hold close when I'm sad."

Fuck, if Ace felt it was necessary to have a heart to heart with her, she must have seriously been pathetic.

"I didn't lose Tracey; we all did. But I'm the only one who feels like this."

She kept busy, doing stuff to keep her mind off it, but the moment her hands were idle, she felt downright miserable.

Ace snorted. "Yeah, right. And it's usual for Rye to listen to pop songs in the car, or for Ian to wear Christmas sweaters in the summer. Plus, Jas wears dresses every day."

Christine opened her mouth and closed it. Rye hated pop songs; it was Tracey's thing. Ian had stubbornly refused to wear the Christmas sweaters Tracey bought them every year. Jas never wore dresses. Ever.

She bit her lip, wondering how she'd missed all these little things.

"It's more obvious to me because I'm like them. I take action to deal with shit. You'll always be different from us, in here," Ace reached out, touching Christine's chest. "We're dominant. Not just your everyday brand of idiotic dominant ready to whip out their dicks at the first challenge; all of us have a crazy high dominance level. You know what you are in all this?"

A weakling. What Ace was saying was that while she might be able to defend herself, and protect the kids, she'd always be weaker inside.

"You're our heart, Chris." She lifted her head and searched Ace's eyes. She didn't read any lie in them, or in the tone of her voice. "I'm the fist, Rye's the brain, Daunte's the dick." They grinned. "We all have a part. Still, the thing is, most of us are expendable. But nothing can function without its heart."

"I'm just..."

"A fight would break out every day without you. I've seen submissive vibes before, I know how they work. You pacify them and make sure every disagreement ends in a discussion, or in a joke."

She frowned. "I don't--"

Ace titled her head and smiled. "You don't know you're doing it?" The Alpha chuckled. "Right. And how many times have you come back from visiting your family and found them at each other's throats, or with bruises from beating the shit out of each other?"

She thought it through, trying to recall one instance when she hadn't come back to a mess.

"The thing with being a loner is, I hung out with people who don't let prejudice get in the way of facts. Submissives are highly sought after amongst loners because dominants are a mess on their own. That's kind of why Vi, Rain, and I are friends with Faith. She balances us out. She's been busy of late, and, I bet anything, if you went to ask Vi and Rain why they're spending so much time with us these days, they'd tell you it's because it's peaceful here. Thanks to you."

Christine rolled her eyes.

"There's no way I alone am responsible for keeping nine - eleven, counting your girlfriends - highly dominant sups from killing each other. We just get along with each other. And the kids help; we have to act like adults around them."

"The kids definitely help, but you're pulling the weight. Try to pay attention to what you're doing next time a fight breaks out. I don't always consciously shove my dominant vibes in people's faces, they sort of burst out. That's probably what you've been doing all these years."

---