Page 209 of Filthy Elites

I shrug. “He caught me my first night out. He didn’t give me much choice, and…”

His eyebrow raises. “And?”

The blush starts at the back of my neck, spreading across the rest of my skin. “It’s possible that I may have liked it—being with him.” And Knox, I think, but don’t add. “By the end, we were both getting something out of it.”

He nods, his expression carefully arranged into something I can’t read. I’m just glad that if it’s judgement, I can’t see it.

“That last time we met...” He looks at me, a bit shier than before. “We kissed. Was that just part of this? Just more pretend?”

I shake my head. “It was a nice kiss. I needed it.”

“But not the way you need someone like Miller.”

“I don’t know what I want, Grayson, other than a shower and a cheeseburger.”

“Fair enough,” he admits.

“What’s going to happen to them?” I ask.

“The charter has been revoked, and the fraternity has twenty-four hours to vacate the property. Royer has been charged with kidnapping, hazing, attempted sexual assault and a slew of other charges involving the fraternity.” His jaw tics. “You aren’t the only one he tortured this week.”

I shift, tugging at my hospital gown. “And Miller? Knox? The others?”

“We have video and other evidence of Rat’s participation. Andrea and Gamma Epsilon are being investigated now for their involvement. Since they were already on probation, it’s likely they will lose their charter, too.” He leans back. “As far as Knox and Miller, we’re going to need your report to determine that. You’ve admitted some of this was consensual. You walked into that building on your own, negotiated with Miller and,” he swallows, eyes shifting away, “participated in a sexual relationship with him. I understand there was a power difference here and the police are willing to listen, but you’ll have to testify and try to prove the difference.”

My skin grows sticky and warm thinking about it—about them. It’s a decision I’m not ready to make now—if I ever will. I slide off the bed and dump the clothing out of the bag. Grayson takes the hint and stands. “I can stick around and give you a ride if you want.”

“Thanks,” I say, “but I already called someone.”

Janelle had been the first person I reached out to and as far as I know, she’s down the hall giving her own report about what happened at the party to the police. Another nail in the Zeta Sig coffin.

“Sure.” He doesn’t move. “I really am sorry this went so far, Reagan.”

“Me too, Gray, but it’s not your fault.” I give him a tight smile. “We did what we set out to do. We brought Royer and Andrea down, although unfortunately, the houses weren’t salvageable.”

“Which means you won’t ever get to be a GE, like you’d hoped.”

“I’m not that girl anymore,” I confess. “That whole world has lost its appeal.”

He spreads his arms and I respond by tucking in against his chest, feeling comfort from his warmth. He squeezes me tight, and later, when I’m alone, I strip off the gown and pull on the clothes, feeling strangely comfortable in the men’s jeans and sweatshirt. Whoever Reagan Lake was before she got to Whittmore is long gone, a new person emerged in her place. This one is strong, determined, and resilient.

The woman I’ve become can bring down an entire system. She knows what it’s like to feel the pleasure of two men at once, and no longer needs a mirror to prove her worth.

“You ready?” Janelle asks as we walk down the hall.

My body aches. My heart hurts. My brain is a confusing bowl of mush, but I feel more complete than I have since I arrived at this school.

“Yeah,” I reply, thinking of how far I’ve come and where in life I want to go. “I’m ready.”

Epilogue

Eight weeks have passedsince the gauntlet, but that doesn’t stop people from looking at me as I cross campus. My hair is two inches longer and still my natural dark blonde. I no longer dress like a boy all the time, but I do have an affinity for hoodies with zippers and pockets. I’m grateful for pretty bras and panties. I never want to shove a tube sock down my pants again.

It’s not my looks giving me stares, or even the blacklist. It’s the article.

Decades of Hazing and Abuse Revealed in Undercover Greek Sting

That was the big story around campus for weeks, well, until a new scandal came out about the football team violating recruitment rules. It wasn’t a good fall for Whittmore. My photo was in the article, along with images of Zeta Sig and Gamma Epsilon on moving day. They both lost their charters and houses.

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