Page 9 of Sunflowers and Surrender

“This feels a little backward. Having them delivered here.” I laugh.

“Well, you deserve all of the celebrating you can handle. You don’t turn twenty-one every day. Look out, bitches. Time to get your party on!”

My mind instantly harkens to the last time I ‘got my party on,’ and I wince. “Well, I think I might have a frozen cocktail with dinner and call it a night.”

The memory of that night remains foggy. Add to it the painful morning after. Heck, I didn’t even have sex and still had to do the walk of shame. I bolted out of there like my hair was on fire. Alex tried to take me home, but I didn’t want to be near him after his declaration.“Fuck no!”Those two little words still haunt me.

“Uh, Tuesday?” Nolan interrupts from the back of the shop.

“Oh, hey. What’s up?”

“So, I have some deliveries.”

Is Nolan having a stroke? He’s only a few years older than me, so that seems unlikely. But isn’t it his sole job to make deliveries?

“Okay. Thanks for letting me know.” I look at Grace and shrug my shoulders in confusion.

“No. They’re for you.” He chuckles. They came in this morning while you were in class. Jo Jo put the orders together and left them next to my other deliveries with a note saying they were to be delivered to you.”

“Oh, wow. Okay.” My cheeks flush in anticipation. I’m never on the receiving end of these.

Nolan darts back into the back of the shop and emerges with two large bouquets. One has an assortment of colorful fall flowers. I reach for the card and read the message.

Happy birthday. Love, Ricky

Awe. That’s so sweet. I’m meeting him and my parents for dinner. I’m surprised he wouldn’t have just given me my gift then. But they’re beautiful. Burying my nose into the bouquet, I take a deep inhale of the fragrant blossoms. He knows how much I love flowers. They’re the perfect gift.

Nolan extends the remaining vase containing a dozen large, bold sunflowers, and my heart skips a beat. They’ve always been my favorite. With my birthday in November, it’s always felt like they’re my birthday flower. Alas, it’s really the chrysanthemum.Yet sunflowers bring such joy when I look at them. To birds also, apparently, given they attract butterflies, hummingbirds, and the like to their nectar. What’s more, it’s thought they symbolize loyalty and adoration. Two qualities I admire.

Plucking the small card from the vase, I open the envelope and take in the inscription.

Happy birthday, Sunny T.

I can’t think of you without picturing a sunflower tucked behind your ear,

just as you looked the first time I saw you.

Love, Alex

Wait.What?That’s where my nickname came from? Tapping my fingernail against my lower lip, I try to remember the first time I saw Alex. I can picture him clear as day, standing beside my brother. They were about to go to the lake together, and I thought he was the most handsome boy I’d ever met. But for the life of me, I couldn’t tell you what I looked like.

“They’re so pretty,” Grace says as she looks over my shoulder.

“They’re my favorite. Flower, I mean.”

“Well, between his message on that card and the way he was looking at you the other night at the party…”

Spinning on my heel, I startle Grace with my unhinged reaction. “What way he was looking at me? Grace, spill it. I don’t remember anything after receiving some texts from him while I was dancing with Xane.”

A mischievous smirk lifts the corner of her mouth. “He was hot. And not his usual fuck hot. He was about to lose it when you were touching Xane. But when Xane put his mouth on your neck, he went ballistic. I don’t care what anyone says, he’s never been that possessive over Ainsley.”

As much as I’d love to believe her, I can’t help but think he’s just an extension of Ricky. He was only stepping up to protect me as my brother would have. Nothing more.

Mom,Dad, and I walk into Luigi’s and are greeted with hugs from the owner. We’ve been coming to this local Italian Eatery for years. Much like many who live in Hanover, celebrating birthdays, milestones, and achievements is all the more delicious here.

Luigi escorts us to a large table in the center of the room, where we find Ricky, his girlfriend, Julia, and Alex waiting for us. Seeing his handsome face for the first time since running from my brother’s apartment feels awkward. But at least he didn’t invite Ainsley to my birthday.

We all say hello and settle into our menus to make our choices. This keeps us quiet for a few moments, given there’s so much to pick from. I decide on the Penne alla Vodka with a side salad and await the others when Luigi asks if I’d like something from the bar. My eyes immediately dart to meet Alex’s, the memory of waking up wrapped in his arms, his firm erection in my back causing my cheeks to warm.

---