Page 16 of Sunflowers and Surrender

“Are you for real?”

“Ainsley. There’s no sense pretending. I don’t want to send any mixed signals. We’re done.”

“Well, I hope you aren’t sniffing around Tuesday. That frigid bitch could never give you what I can.”

I had to bite the inside of my cheek to keep from lashing out at her. But I can’t give my feelings for Tuesday away in anger. “Don’t you dare talk about my friend that way, Ainsley.”

She spins on her tall, pointy heel and stomps toward the door. “On that note, I’ll end my vacation having a little fun. Now that I’m no longer tied down.”

She hurls a sweatshirt hanging from a hook by the door at me before flinging the door wide and storming out.

In her absence, I seize the opportunity and pack up my things. I plan to disembark the minute the ship docks and we’re allowed off. Hopefully, I can hop on an earlier flight on standby if a seat opens. I’ll even cough up my savings to upgrade Ainsley’s ticket so she can fly business class on a later flight to avoid the Palmers altogether. I really should’ve waited until we were home for this break-up. Holy shit, the lengths I’ll go to in order to avoid having to sleep with her again.

Yet Ainsley is just one piece of this messy puzzle. I’ll never believe that kiss was a mistake. But Ricky will never approve of me dating his sister. And do I want to risk giving up the Palmers if a relationship with Tuesday didn’t work out? They mean a lot to me. I’m the youngest of four kids and the only boy. I’m constantly treated like a child when I’m with my family. I love them, but I feel at home with the Palmers. Heck, I’ve spent the last few Christmas dinners with them.

Moving forward with Tuesday is going to take a lot of careful consideration. I’m not the relationship type. My focus has been on my fire career and my friends. I’ve only ever dated casually until one of them says they want more. But I know there’d be nothing cavalier about dating Tuesday. I can safely say I’d turn into a possessive beast if I ever saw another man’s hands on her.

Yet, staying away is getting more and more difficult.

After that kiss, she’s all I can think about. How do I move on from this?

Chapter 13

Tuesday

Slosh. Slosh. Slosh.My boots make an unpleasant, wet, slurping sound as I trudge through the cold slush to my car. While the blanket of fresh snow on the trees and grass is pretty, it’s just a dismal mess everywhere else. This overcast, almost gray day matches my mood. I’m a far cry from Miami now.

I haven’t heard from or seen Alex since we returned from our trip. Not only did he not join us for dinner the last evening, but he and Ainsley disembarked without even saying goodbye to anyone. My heart hurt worse than it had waking up with him the morning after that squad party. The last time he quickly dismissed any consideration of something physical between us.

I’d dreamt of a night like that with Alex for years, yet I won’t allow myself to replay that kiss. While I’ll never regret it, his rejection has stung more than a little. It never ended up like this afterward in my dreams. It’s as if the magic of that one incredible night with him onboard that ship is utterly tainted by the days that followed.

Starting my car, I rub my hands up and down my arms. The chill is sinking into my bones. I let the heater warm up before backing out. I’m leaving an hour early to ensure I make it to my volunteer job in the inclement weather. It’ll be a busy night for the rescue squad with this early mix of precipitation. While there wasn’t a lot of accumulation, and it doesn’t seem overly icy, this can be the most deceiving type of winter weather. People underestimate the risk when the temperature drops and the wet roadways turn to black ice.

I turn up the radio to hear Sia over the repetitive swish of the snow-laden wiper blades. The snowfall has lightened, but each heavy, wet flake looks the size of a golf ball as it smacks against the windshield. I find myself leaning forward as if this will help me see more clearly through the cold, soppy mess.

Whoosh. My car swerves a bit as the eighteen-wheeler flies by me on the highway, adding a new layer of dirty, mushy spray over my car. Just when I feel as if I’ve righted myself, the front end of my car veers into the other lane and spins as I overcorrect the steering wheel. I can’t help but let out a scream as my car flies off the highway onto the shoulder and collides with a metal guardrail.

My heart is hammering in my chest.Get a grip, Tuesday. You’re okay.I reach to turn off the ignition when I realize the car is no longer running.Great.Stepping out of the car, I walk around the front end and see the damage to the passenger side isn’t terrible. But if I can’t get the car to start back up, there may be something worse going on underneath the hood. What’s more, I’m going to need a tow.

Sloshing back to the driver’s seat, I attempt to restart the car without success. Ugh. I pull out my phone, and as if on auto-pilot, I begin to call Alex. He’s always been my go-to for anything car related. Not only does Alex have a tow truck business he runs on his days off from the fire department, but he’s also just a wiz with cars. My brother, not so much.

Yet the reality of our current situation becomes clear, and I refuse to ask him for help after he ghosted me following that kiss. Okay, so maybe ghosted isn’t the right word. I knew he was in a relationship. I was in the wrong too. But there’s still no way I’m calling him.

Hitting Grace’s number on my contact list, I tap my foot on the floorboard, praying she’s home.

“Hey, girl. Whatcha doing? Hot chocolate and romcoms?”

“I wish.” I shiver. “Does your brother still have that big SUV with all-wheel drive? I just slid off of the highway on Route One near Atlee Road on the way to my volunteer job, and now the car won’t start back up.”

“Yeah. But why don’t you call Alex?”

“Grace, I told you what happened. I’m not calling him.” I’d shared everything with Grace the night after my return. I tried to downplay how much it hurt and focused on my amazing night with him. I refused to shed any more tears over this ridiculous crush.

“Tues, he’s your friend. He’d want to-”

“Grace, I don’t have much battery left on my cell. I’m going to have to call someone else if your brother isn’t there.”

“Oh, okay. I’ll get him. Put your phone on low battery and hang in there. Someone will get to you soon. Promise.”

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