Page 65 of Bitter Arrangement

“You’d be surprised at how often this happens,” the doctor says, yanking on the thread and tying it off with neat, quick motions.

“He’s right. This isn’t the first time I’ve been shot.”

“It was a good one though.” The doctor puts in another stitch. “Really had to dig in there for the bullet.”

I sit down heavily on the side of the bed, staring at the ghoulish tableau. “I’m feeling a little sick,” I murmur.

“Please don’t puke on the comforter,” Alexan warns.

I curl up in a ball on my side and pull a sheet over me as the doctor finishes up. The two men make jokes about all the terrible wounds Alexan has gotten over the years. When they’re done, the doctor shakes his hand. “Thanks for keeping me in business,” he says. “Make sure you tell all your friends to keep getting shot.” He wags a finger. “But not in the head! I can’t fix those.”

The doctor leaves, and I’m alone with my husband. He sits heavily down beside me and puts a hand on my leg.

“You’re okay,” he says softly, rubbing me in circles.

“Are you sure?” My voice is muffled from the pillow. “I don’t feel okay.”

“Baby, look at me.”

I hesitate, not sure I can bring myself to come out of my little cave.

“I messed up,” I whisper, guilt hammering down my chest. “I got caught. I told you I could do it, and I nearly got you killed instead.”

“That’s not what happened at all.”

“How can you say that? You got shot trying to protect me. You had to kill two men.”

“It’s not your fault. None of that was your fault.”

I slip the sheet back and look out. He’s frowning at me, concern in his expression. His hand is still on my leg, gently stroking me.

“How is itnotmy fault?”

“Because I’m the one that fucked up.”

I frown and shake my head. “That’s not true.”

“No, baby, I’m the one that should be apologizing.” He shifts deeper into the bed and sits with his back against the headboard. He pulls me against him, hugging me tightly. “Listen, when I was breaking into that laptop, I took my eye off the cameras. I didn’t notice when that guard went to check the second floor. If I had warned you in time, you would’ve been prepared.”

“I left too soon. I should’ve been more careful.”

“Baby, tracking the guards wasmyjob. What happened back there was my fault.”

I don’t really believe him. I mean, he’s right; he should’ve been watching them more closely, but I don’t blame him at all for what happened.

If I were better at sneaking and stealing, it wouldn’t have mattered.

But I’m not as good as I think I am, and seeing that fact play out really bothers me.

I should’ve been able to handle it, but I couldn’t.

“Thank you,” I whisper.

“For what? For the truth?”

“No, for coming back for me.”

He holds me tighter. “Baby, I’ll never abandon you. Not while you’re my wife. Not while I’m breathing.”

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