Page 88 of As You Ice It

She reaches over and gives my arm a quick squeeze. “It’s okay to be scared. And you don’t have to, but if you want to talk about it, I’ve been there. I mean, obviously, our situations aren’t exactly the same. But I can speak to what it’s like to be in a relationship with a hockey player. And I was definitely terrified before Eli and I got married. But I just did it scared.” She smiles at her husband, who is shaking his floppy blond hair out the same way Panda is shaking his fur. “Best decision I’ve ever made.”

I grab one of the oversized marshmallows off the table and pop it in my mouth. It’s melty and delicious. I should ask her where she got these and stock up.

I should also stop being a big chicken and talk to her.

Before I can re- or over-think it, I blurt out, “I’m scared of marrying someone with the whole hockey player thing. I’m scared of how fast I’ve fallen. And I’m scared of myself.” I take a breath.

“Of yourself?” Bailey asks.

“I’m not good at committing to things. I get bored and restless.” I swallow, and it takes effort. “I’m so scared I’ll want to run, and it will break both our hearts. Liam’s too.”

Bailey, ever the good listener, tilts her head and thinks for a few seconds. When she smiles, it’s soft.

“I know I don’t know you very well,” she says, “but from what I’ve seen, I don’t think you have reason to be scared about that.”

“No? To be fair, you haven’t seen me cut ties and jump ship.”

She shakes her head. “Maybe you get bored and restless withthings, but you, Naomi, strike me as someone who is very good at committing topeople.”

It’s a big statement, one that hits me right in the feels. I need to process. I might be processing it for a while.

“What about the other stuff?”

Her smile takes on a mischievous edge. “You’re talking to someone who married a hockey player within a few weeks. And I couldn’t be happier. So … I’m not going talk you out of a hockey player or moving fast.”

I laugh. “Touché.”

The guys come in then, and I’m glad this house has a laundry room at the back to collect the wet boots and coats.

I’m also glad it takes them a moment to take off their wet things and dry Panda with a towel because I need to blink back my unexpected tears.

Because Bailey is right. I am good at committing to people. I decided to commit to Liam when he was still the size of a grape or whatever fruit the app compared him to the week I found out I was pregnant. I’m committed to my whole family back in Oakley. Not just Dad and Jake, but the whole extended not-blood-related family I’ve found with Eloise, her sisters, and their significant others.

I might have left them in the geographical sense, but my heart is very much still with the people I love back home.

After Bailey’s assessment, I’m seeing my fear as it really is—not huge, as it seemed to me, but a tiny little thing that simply casts a big shadow. With the bright light cast by her true words, the looming shadow is gone.

The fear is real and it’s still there, but I see it in its true proportion now. I remember Bailey’s earlier words about marrying Eli.

I can do this, too, I think.I can just do it scared.

“What’d we miss?” Eli says, coming into the room with a wide grin and eyes only for Bailey.

“Nothing,” she says, giving me a wink.

But it feels like our little conversation and this whole morning of telling Liam about us and getting a long-term commitment kind of pet was a very, very bigsomething.

CHAPTER20

Camden

I’m notsure why I’m nervous when Naomi and Liam arrive at my house with Panda in tow. Mike finally convinced Naomi to let him cut Liam’s hair—and mine—the night before I leave on a weeklong road trip. Jordan still refuses even a trim but said he wanted to be here to watch the show. I think he even brought popcorn.

Despite all the time we’ve spent together, she’s never been to my place and Liam hasn’t met Mike or Jordan. I wrap an arm around Naomi as soon as she’s through the door, pressing my lips to her cheek. Jordan’s grin is big enough to be picked up from outer space.

I ignore him. “Hey,” I tell Naomi quietly. “I’m glad you’re here.”

“I finally get to see your house!”

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