Page 86 of As You Ice It

Like, for example, a dog.

“Oh, you aregood,” I tell Panda. “But I’m onto you. A master manipulator, that’s what you are.”

Panda blinks at me as though to say,Yeah? But can you say no to me?

As it turns out, I can’t.

Twenty minutes later, I’ve said an official yes, and once the paperwork is submitted, Liam and I are now the owners of a dog with two different colored eyes, only three legs, and a toothy smile that might scare off an intruder.

“How did he lose the leg?” I ask Bailey.

She and I are sitting inside the house now, watching Liam, Eli, and Camden play with Panda as snow begins to fall. They’ve tossed tennis balls, thrown a frisbee, and played tug-of-war with a knotted rope Bailey brought. Panda loves it all, running faster than I’d expect given the lack of a leg.

“He was found by the side of the road after being hit by a car. At least, we assume that’s what happened. The leg was too badly mangled to save,” she says.

“I can’t believe anyone would hit a dog and just drive off,” I say.

“I know. And he wasn’t microchipped or wearing a collar, though he seems to have been loved. He’s well-trained and very smart. Most border collies are, and that’s what he looks like.”

“Doesn’t seem to slow him down much,” I note as Panda manages to outrun Liam and Eli, who are both trying to take the rope from his mouth.

“No, he adapted really well. He’s a pretty special dog. That’s why I thought of him when you asked about a dog for Liam. He’s smart, protective but not aggressive, playful, and very loyal. He’ll be Liam’s new best friend.”

“You can stop trying to talk him up,” I tell her. “I’ve already said yes. There’s no way I could separate those two now.”

Liam pretended to faint, and Panda is now sitting on his chest, licking his face with great enthusiasm. Camden looks up, his eyes meeting mine through the window, his smile huge and his eyes bright.

Just when I think it’s time for those fluttery, new relationship feelings to stop, they ramp up and explode into something totally different.

I’m not experiencing butterflies or some kind of delicate flower of a feeling for Camden. He is two paddles of a defibrillator pressed directly to my chest. I have lost my ability to breathe—and possibly stand up.

“How did Liam take it?” Bailey asks, sipping her hot cocoa. In addition to the dog, she brought a basket with various kinds of hot chocolate and even some fluffy homemade marshmallows purchased from some bakery in town.

Basically, she’s my new best friend. It was precarious with the whole dog thing, but after watching Liam play with Panda for the last half hour, she keeps her status.

“You mean me telling him about Camden and me?”

Bailey smiles and gives me the tiniest of eye rolls, barely registering on the scale. “Yes. Your hard launch, as the kids would say.”

“Gah. Kids these days,” I say lightly. Then, to stall, I take a sip of hot cocoa and lick the whipped cream off my lip.

It’s been a few weeks of letting Camden invade my life. We see each other every chance we get—which is never as often as I’d like. I go to all his home games, upping what Liam calls my hockey literacy. I watched him work with Liam in the final few hockey classes and a few times when Cam got extra ice time for the two of them.

Once—and only once—they convinced me to try skating. I’m pretty sure one of my butt cheeks is permanently bruised from how many times I fell on it.

We’ve been texting late into the night, every night. Sometimes we even talk on the phone, though we’re equally opposed to using the phone as an actualphone. We’ve gone on occasional dates while Liam is hanging out with his new friends and once while Parker and Logan offered to have him over while we went out.

Oh, yeah, and Camden said he loved me.

I’ll admit—it was unexpected.

Especially when he still won’t really talk about his family. I haven’t pushed, because when someone doesn’t mention their mom or dad or siblings, they are actually saying a lot. Am I dying to know? Yes. But I’m forcing myself to wait on his time, his terms.

Despite the clear understanding that Camden and I have been in a relationship, there was never a discussion. No actual words laying out the terms. We were acting on an unspoken commitment.

Which made me kind of feral, just waiting.

And with such a conversation not even appearing as a mirage shimmering on the horizon, I never expected his confessed I love you.

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