Page 41 of Psycho

I run my fingers up his bare muscular chest, and admit my truth.

“My mother is the only reason I’m not begging you to take my life, Massimo. While I don’t think I deserve to be punished for anything I’ve done to you, I do deserve to be hurt. It’s not for the reasons you think. The guilt, for things I’ve allowed to happen, is all consuming, and some days, I think it might swallow me whole. If I died, that pain would end. Yet, I beg you to let me live for her. For the promise I made to my father. I said I’d take care of her, and I cannot do that, if I’m six feet under. You understand that, right? Family means everything to you, and the little family I have left means everything to me too.”

His eyes flash a look of pain, before he returns to his impassive expression, the one he almost always wears on his impossibly handsome face. His Adam’s apple bobs as he swallows hard, and I have no idea why that’s so hot.

Running his thumb over my bottom lip, he speaks low.

“Get in the pool, little lamb. My control is hanging by a thread. Go enjoy the water before I lose my goddamn mind, and take the option away from you.”

He slaps my pussy, and I yelp from the sting, before darting off in the direction of the pool while feeling his heated gaze follow me, like the wolf tracking the lamb, but I’m not afraid. I like it. And that’s how I know I’m in serious trouble.

For years I have thought I hated Massimo, not because of anything he had done, but because he was a Bonetti. He’s convinced his father didn’t kill mine, and if that’s true, it makes this vendetta worse. As it was, holding an entire family responsible for one man’s actions may not have been right, but now, I don’t know anything anymore. I convinced myself I hated him, all of them, but now I’m more conflicted than ever. The truth is, I had a silly little crush on Massimo when I was a kid, but now I am not so sure it was so silly. My heart is like a magnet, pulling me to him, feeling less like the captive I am, and more like a willing participant.

I move down the steps into the water, and sigh at the warmth on my skin. The pool must be heated because it’s in the low seventies today, but the water feels more like eighty. It’s Olympic sized, with a rock garden on the far end, complete with a waterfall, and I swim to it, wanting to get a closer look. Grabbing onto the side of the pool, I let the water flow over me. It feels far cooler than the temperature of the pool, but still I welcome it. The sun is shining on this cloudless day, and for a moment, everything feels perfect. I’m calm, and at peace, but I know that could end in a nanosecond.

CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX

PSYCHO

Black and white, black and white,I chant in my head like a goddamn crazy person. It’s time for drastic measures, because my head is becoming entirely too fucked up. I need her gone. I need her to disappear, not only from my home, but my life. This entire thing has gotten way off track.

I’m sitting in a lounge chair instead of getting into the water, because every time she’s within touching distance, I cannot stop myself. It’s not just fucking her, if it were, this would be much easier. It’s fucking everything. The softness of her skin, the way her fingers feel as they drag down my chest, the goddamn way she places her hand on my face, and stares at me like I’m not the bad guy I know I am. Her eyes tell me she sees a man that does not exist.

“Massimo,” she coos, in a sweet voice dripping with honey.

I lift my chin in a ‘what’ action, and her smile fucking steals my breath.

It’s time to set things in motion, because I don’t know if she’s doing this intentionally, but I need to get back to life as I know it.

“I’m lonely. Will you please come in the pool?”

She stands in the shallow end, with the water just under her belly button. Her hair is wet, and hanging below the bathing suit top, and that fucking red bikini, her pebbled nipples pressing against the fabric, calling to me like a goddamn siren. Begging for me. I should tell her no, and stay the fuck away from her gorgeous body, but I’m an idiot, so that’s not what I’m going to do.

Rising from my chair, I make my way to the pool and step into the water. Anastasia’s eyes follow my every movement, only making my cock harder. Then I walk over to her, and my equilibrium is knocked out of the fucking atmosphere. She all but jumps into my arms, wrapping her legs around my waist, and arms around my neck, while she smiles at me and whispers a sweet ‘thank you’.

My brother, Reaper, would tell me to kill her, get it done with, but things aren’t that simple, because I don’t think I can. The thought of being the one to end her life, causes physical pain in my chest. I know she has to die, and I knew it when I made the ‘thirty day’ deal. There was never a moment when I believed the words I spoke to her. Letting her go was never an option.

Black and white,I think to myself, as she presses her lips to my neck. Soft kisses graze my skin, causing a groan to erupt from me.

This needs to end. I have let this go on far too long already. She can’t keep fucking with my head if she’s not here. This is the first time in my life I’ve felt so out of control. I’ve never struggled to end a life. It’s as easy as breathing for me. Except now.

Then it occurs to me that she can die the way she was supposed to, and I don’t have to lift a finger. I don’t know what the fuck is wrong with me, but this is the solution. Let somebody else handle her, since I can’t bring myself to do it.

Anastasia gently brushes her lips over my beard, her soft breath on my skin feeling like a heaven I don’t deserve, before she kisses me on the lips softly. Digging her fingers into my back, she pulls my bottom lip into her mouth, and sucks gently.

“Massimo,” she breathes, as she releases my lip.

Fuck.

Her eyes bore into mine, and I swallow hard. I have no right to have her, with what my plans are. Not having a right doesn’t change the fact that I will take what I want, and right now, I want her. My need for her is out of fucking control, and so I do what I shouldn’t even want.

I take her lips.

I slide my hand inside her bathing suit.

I stroke her soaked slit.

Then I take her confession I don’t deserve, as I yank my shorts down, pull her bottoms to the side, and sink into her.

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