Page 15 of Kissed and Missed

I am, aren’t I? It’s ironic we’re standing in the dark, when it feels like someone just threw Technicolor paint all over my gray, ordinary existence. How did I forget that he has this effect on me? How does a relationship that should be bad make me feel this good?

Julian’s hips cant forward as he lowers his lips to mine again, his hands on my ass, and my pussy clenches, agonizingly empty. I whimper, my hands clutching his shoulders in an effort to tether myself to reality. It doesn’t work. We’re so wrapped up in this, totally out of control, and now, there’s only one possible way it can end.

We’ve barely talked. I don’t know what we’re doing here, or if he’s spoken to Riley, or any of it. None of that feels particularly important at the moment, however, because if he doesn’t fuck me, I might actually die.

“Fuck.” Julian’s rough curse when we break apart makes heat curl up my spine. He casts a wary look over his shoulder toward the doors lining one side of the ballroom, as if just now remembering where we are. “We need to get out of here.”

9

JULIAN

For a moment, Honor just gazes up at me, worry shining in her blue eyes. “Yes. Please. I mean, if you want to…” She trails off, and I let out a choked noise of disbelief, because surely she can’t be serious.Want to?The possibility of being allowed to fuck this woman is more exciting to me than any Christmas, birthday, and professional achievement I’ve ever had. Combined.

A shrill little laugh bubbles from her lips. “I’m sorry. I’m just nervous, I’m sorry. You’re, you know,you.”

“Me?” I ask, bemused. Having a lot of money feels like a fairly irrelevant attribute when the woman you’re trying to sweep off her feet doesn’t care about it. With that out of the equation, Honor Vogel is about fifteen miles out of my league, and I’m already so far gone that if she walked away—still a very distinct possibility—I’d be a wreck.

Honor scoffs, “You’re super hot and successful, and you’re in the news all the time for doing something impressive that I don’t really understand. I’m sure you date women who are, like amazing, and I’m just this normal person and…”

I should be pleased she finds me attractive and impressive, but as she rambles on, my desperation to reassure her is far more pressing. Swallowing, I stare down at her beautiful face, still pinched in worry and embarrassment. “Honor, I haven’t had sex in about seven years.”

Honor makes a choked noise of surprise, her hesitant expression clearing. “Wait, seriously?”

A low chuckle of relief rumbles in my chest as I step forward again, and when I kiss her, she moans quietly, melting into my embrace. It’s addictive, feeling this woman respond to my touch, sensing her need for me.

When I force myself to draw back—because if I let things get any more heated I’ll end up fucking her in the middle of this ballroom—we’re both smiling.

“It’s important to me that you know this wasn’t my intention in coming here. I just wanted to see you,” I tell her, and Honor’s teeth find her swollen bottom lip as my words sink in.

“That’s kind of making me want to fuck you more, if I’m honest.”

My answering bark of laughter echoes off the high ceiling, and even when it fades away, my smile never slips from wide and effortless. “You want to fuck me?”

“Obviously.” She beams, so beautiful my pulse stutters at the sight of her.

God, I feel like a bastard for putting her in this position, but if the last six weeks have proven anything, it’s that we aren’t forgetting each other. Those three days burrowed under my skin and from now on, my life will forever be split into two eras:Before HonorandAfter Honor. Even if it’s the most selfish thing I’ve ever done, I can’t walk away.

“Come upstairs with me?” I hear myself beg, and Honor’s shy, answering nod makes my heart soar.

Outside the ballroom, two members of my security detail are waiting, but I’m too wrapped up in the beautiful young woman at my side to pay them any mind. Keeping Honor’s hand twined tightly with my own, I pull her toward the back staircase, avoiding the lobby, and neither of us says a word as we climb the three floors to my suite.

With every step, the anticipation seems to notch higher too. The few days when she wasn’t speaking to me were some of the most miserable of my life, but against all odds, I found a way to fix it. I thought I’d lost her, that I’d realized too late I shouldn’t have let her go in the first place, and now it’s surreal to realize I haven’t.

She wants me.

A familiar, bulky, heavily tattooed man in a suit is waiting outside the door. “Grey, I think you remember Honor Vogel. I’d like you to arrange for her to have twenty-four-hour security. As soon as possible.”

“Of course. Good to see you again, Miss Vogel.” He removes a key card from his pocket and unlocks the door, standing back to let us through.

“Oh, no thank you! It’s nice to see you again, though, Grey!” She laughs, as I give him a look over her shoulder which clearly saysno thank youisn’t an option here. “I definitely don’t need security, Julian,” Honor tells me as the hotel room door closes behind us.

I wish that were true, but it isn’t. Honor has no way of knowing that the more money you have, the bigger the target on your back. My loved ones are possibly in even more danger than I am, considering the number of bad people in this world who would use them for leverage. Riley has security, as does my ex-wife, the few living members of my family, and now Honor will too. Their safety isn’t something I’m willing to gamble with, andjust the thought of something happening to her because of her association with me is gut-wrenching.

“Nonnegotiable,” I tell her firmly. “I know this is a lot, and we haven’t gone over the specifics of what we’re doing here?—”

Honor twines her arms around the back of my neck, and whatever I was going to say is lost as I get my first proper look at her face in the light after over a month. “Not everything is a business deal, Julian Ballard,” she reminds me playfully, and I watch with fascination as I draw my thumb over her full bottom lip, still swollen from my kisses, and her pupils dilate in response.

She’s right. Business is the furthest thing from my mind right now. In fact, the impulse to keep her here forever, hidden away from the world—business be damned—is my only priority.

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