Page 109 of Give Me a Shot

“No,” Alice said. “I’m—”

Jess’s doorbell rang, pulling her attention out of the call.

“What’s wrong?” Alice asked, her lips flashing a quirk to one side. It was an odd little expression. The doorbell rang again. Twice. Jess frowned.

“Be right back,” Jess said, sliding the laptop and Steinem onto her bed. “I’ll go see what this is about.”

“De nada!” Alice said. “Wait. That’s not right. Go take care of it. I’ll be right here.”

The ringing became more incessant as Jess got down the hall and through the living room. Whoever was at the door was apparently interested in pissing her off before she opened it. She checked the peephole, and the bright purple hair she saw made her heart drop.

“Steph!” she shouted, ripping the door open.

“You know,” Stephanie said, readjusting her backpack on her shoulder. “It’s not very polite making people wait on your doorstep. I thought you Midwestern folks were supposed to be nicer than that.”

Jess, who had shrieked with happiness maybe twice in her life, let out an enormous shout of joy and launched herself into Stephanie’s arms. Stephanie hugged back, laughing, and Jess joined in. But something shifted. She needed to hug Stephanie tighter and tighter, even as her friend’s arms loosened. Suddenly a sob bubbled up, and Jess pressed her face against Stephanie’s shoulder to stifle it.

“Jess?” Stephanie asked, tone serious. She tightened her arms again. “Jess.”

Jess couldn’t answer. She was thrilled but also felt that the slightest inhale to reply would burst the dam holding back her tears. She shook her head, eyes crunched tight. “Jess,” Stephanie warned. “Inside.”

Jess let go enough so that they could get in. Stephanie awkwardly kicked her other bag in and shut the door. Jess clung to her again. Then the sobs exploded.

“It’s okay, it’s okay,” whispered Stephanie. “Come on. Couch.”

They made their way over, crumpling together.

“Jess, babe,” Stephanie said, rubbing Jess’s back as she cried into her shoulder. “I don’t want to let go, but where’s Alice? She’s going to worry.”

Steph was right. Jess got a couple of quick breaths in. “My bed,” she said quickly. “Straight down the hall.”

“I’m coming right back,” Stephanie said. She kissed Jess on the crown of her head and rushed to get Jess’s laptop.

—

An hour later, the storm had subsided. Jess was lying on the couch with her head in Stephanie’s lap, the two of them facing Alice on Jess’s laptop screen. Her empty mug of tea sat beside it, next to a pile of crumpled tissues waiting to be tidied up. The surprise visit her friends had planned behind her back was the thing she didn’t know she needed the most.

“So,” Stephanie said, placing her mug of tea on the other side of the laptop. “The game plan.”

“Yes,” Alice said, pen in hand, looking at the notes she had been taking. “First things first, Jess is going to make anappointment with two of the grief counselors on the list we made. She’ll see which one she prefers and continue working with them for the foreseeable future.”

“Right, Jess?” Stephanie asked.

“Well, yes,” Jess said. “But I still don’t see why an individual counseloranda grief support group is necessary.”

Alice sighed.

“I’ve avoided bringing this up before because it seemed like you…weren’t in a place to hear it,” she said. “But a lot of the ladies my NGO works with became active in justice and gender equality after the murder of a sibling. They’ve been doing this work for years, and every now and then something triggers a memory, and they start sobbing. They told me that the grief doesn’t leave. But they got better at accepting it and living with it specifically byspending time with people who have experienced the same thing. And I’m sure a group will be especially helpful since it seems things are going to have to be on pause with your parents for the foreseeable future.”

“Oh,” Jess said. “Okay.”

“Next point,” Alice said. “Jess is going to get back in touch with her doctor and do the final round of suggested tests, just to be absolutely sure.”

“I think it has been established that my health problems were due to grief. As much as it pains me to admit that you were right, Steph,” she said flatly. “Now that we’ve figured that out, I don’t see why I need more tests.” Stephanie pinched her upper arm.

“Ouch!” Jess cried out.

“I did not just take three planes to get hereandhave to make small talk with an idiot taxi driver for you to be stubborn. We are going to be thorough with this,” Stephanie said.

---