A drink is what I need.

__________

The place is packed now, filled with bored small-towners. I walk up to the bartender I saw earlier and order a bourbon before sliding onto a stool at the opposite end of the bar.

Looking around, I take in the people surrounding me. A few women sit at a table playing quarters. Some too young to drink, some too old to care.

Guys play darts down at the end of the bar, and I see a few sitting across from me talking amongst themselves. I throw back my drink as soon as it hits the bar top.

“Keep ’em coming,” I say, tossing a few bills beside my empty glass.

“You ain’t from around here,” he says to me as he grabs my glass and money. “You with that girl that came in here earlier?”

“Yeah, why?” I ask.

He shrugs. “Just guessing. You two sure like your liquor, but shit, if you paying, I ain’t got no problem. Just don’t cause any and we’ll be good.”

I smirk. “Just get my bourbon.”

He looks at me for a moment before sauntering off, deciding making money is more important than whatever else he was about to say.

By round five, I’m feeling looser and my mind has slowed down.

But anger is still there. It lurks in the shadows of my subconscious ready and waiting. I’m afraid I’ll never be rid of it.

But maybe with Kathrine by my side I will learn to handle it better. I take sip of the beer I ordered on the last round, my eyes looking down the bar and narrowing. The men who’ve been sitting at the opposite end keep darting their eyes over to me and I can’t help but wonder why. I swallow the beer and place my bottle down, clearing my throat and pulling my wallet out. I toss some money beside my longneck and stand up.

Adjusting my coat, I move slowly around the bar until I reach the gentlemen.

I put my hand on one of their shoulders and they both turn my way.

I smile. “Sorry, but I couldn’t help but wonder. Do you know me?”

They both look at each other, shaking their heads before saying, “No.”

I nod. “Then what the fuck are you looking at me for?”

One guy stands up and the other goes to do the same, but I act first, slamming my fist into his face.

It feels good. It feels too good and it fucking hurt.

I smile just as a fist lands against my jaw.

The bar roars to life and I hear tables and chairs scatter as I swing my fist and feel hit after hard hit.

I need this.

Fuck, if I don’t need this.

My anger comes to life, flesh and bone.

I release rage and bad memories. Pain and heartache. Life’s not fair and how could all this bad shit happen to my girl? My face goes numb and blood fills my mouth, but I don’t stop the onslaught. The bartender does, and within moments the guy and I are broken apart and the bartender is shoving me out the door. I stumble but don’t fall, turning back to the bartender with a bloodstained grin I can’t help.

I feel fantastic.

He shakes his head at me. “You’re fucking crazy. Stay out of my bar. You and your girl.”

I spit onto the ground as he walks back inside, slamming the door shut behind him. A deep rumbling comes from my chest and I find myself laughing.