Page 245 of Sigils & Spells

If I wasn't doing my daily chores, I huddled in my room, alone and despondent. Diana stopped by regularly to try and get me out of bed, but try as I might, I couldn't bring myself to care about anything.

After running off from the river, the horses made their way back to the barn, riderless, which had been the first indication to Toby that something must have happened while we were out. He tried getting me to come by the stable and work with them as I'd loved to before, but I couldn't seem to even step through the door without Evie. Not yet.

One morning, I sat at the edge of the pool in the laundry area scrubbing linens, lost in thought. Footsteps approached me from behind, which I ignored. That choice garnered me a solid shove from behind, knocking me off the ledge and into the water face first. The sheet I'd been working with wrapped around me like a net, making getting my head back above water a struggle.

By the time I unwound myself and caught my breath, whoever pushed me was long gone and nobody occupied the room but myself. Tears mingled with the water running in rivulets from my hair and down my face. Diana happened to come in before I got dried off and ran to my side.

“Annarah! What in heaven's name happened here?” She reached out and pulled me to my feet, grabbing a towel from the stack and wrapping it around my shoulders.

“I must have lost my balance. I fell in.” The last thing I wanted was to talk about it.

“Annarah Grace, lying is a sin, and you know it. I may be getting older, but I am not getting any stupider. You have never fallen into the washing pool. And don't think I am now aware of at least some of what has been going on around here.” She fixed me with a stern glare.

“I'm sorry. I didn't mean to lie to you. I just don't want to cause any more drama.”

“Then tell me what happened right now, or I will get the High Priestess and there will be drama for days if I have any say in the matter.”

“Please don't!” I held up my hands, as if that might ward off any action she considered taking. “I was sitting here at the edge scrubbing this sheet. Someone came up behind me and pushed me in. I didn't see them because when I heard the footsteps, I assumed they were just passing through. I've been mostly avoiding any interaction with anyone.”

“Annarah! How often is this happening?”

“Diana, please. Can we just not worry about it?”

“Spill. Now.”

I blew my breath out between pursed lips. “This is the first time anyone has pushed me into a pool.”

She raised her eyebrows. “But?”

Of course she'd pick up on my evasiveness. “Well. I've found chicken poop in my bed, smeared into my sheets. I picked up some of my clothes from the drying line with slashes cut into them. There have been notes left in my room. Everybody whispers about me when I walk by. They all believe that I killed Evie and some of you are trying to hide that from them. They don't know or understand why. And they all want me gone.”

This time, I didn't even cry. With effort, I managed to separate her death from the things that were happening to me, even though they were inextricably tied. There was no reason to cry for myself when I believed I deserved everything I got from the others.

“Annarah. Why didn't you say something? To any one of us? This is not okay. Nobody should be doing these things to you.”

“I should leave. But this is the only home I know. The goddess has not stripped me of my powers, nor expelled me from her temple when I go to worship. I still dream. So what am I to do?”

“Oh, my child.”

“I have no money. I can't just walk out the front gates and rent an apartment or get a job. I wouldn't even know where to start. Or how. I'm absolutely useless anywhere else in the world, and I'm not wanted here.”

“Youarewanted here. Not just by me and the High Priestess, but the Goddess Selene herself. And others. But most especially the goddess. As you mentioned, she has not denied you access to her in any way.”

“But... If she wants me here, why I am so miserable? Why is she allowing these things to happen to me? Why didn't she protect Evie?”

At the utterance of her name, the tears threatened to fall, but I managed to choke them down. If possible, Diana looked even more sorry for me than she had when she first found me wet and shivering.

“Oh honey, I wish I had answers for you. I really do. But I don't. Far be it for me to even begin to guess the motive behind the decisions the goddess makes. But we are going to have to do something about this. We are going to talk to the High Priestess and come up with a solution.”

She stood, tugging my hand to pull me upright with her. At first I resisted, but I needed to go back to my room and get dry clothes either way, so I let her help me up. Together, we walked back down the hall toward the exit.

Just as we reached the end of the corridor, Priestess Pia showed up, eliciting a sigh from me. She immediately pounced on the fact that I was leaving the wash house.

“Where are you going? I know you aren't finished with your chores.”

“Do you know that because you happen to be the one responsible for trying to drown her not that long ago?” Diana's words seethed with a quiet venom.

Pia had the good sense to at least pretend to be shocked at the allegation. “I guarantee you I do not know what you're talking about.” She looked me up and down. “Why are you wet?”

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