Page 13 of Shot Through the Heart

STELLA

“I can’t do this,”I say the second I open the door. Zoey squeals, not bothering to spare me a second glance as she slips around my frozen body in the entryway to go play with Harper.

“It’s a little too late to change your mind.” Eva reminds me. Gently, she nudges me aside and makes her way toward my small dining room table to set down her bags. Numbly, I skirt around the girls who are already playing on the floor and follow her.

What the hell was I thinking by signing this contract? I had absolutely no right to have that much confidence in myself and to think that this would be easy.

Since seeing him last week, I’ve kept myself busy. We haven’t spoken since then. The closest we came was an email he sent that was forwarded from my boss, Garrett. There was no hint that anything was wrong, or even that Greyson knew me in it. It was straight and to the point, giving details on where to meet him before today’s game so we could be seen together outside the arena.

So, in the guise of acting like everything is perfectly normal, I focused on lining up childcare for Harper during these six events. Once that was done, I dove in and helped with random assistant tasks for Paige as a distraction. Although as the week went on, relying on work as a distraction became increasingly difficult. Garrett and Paige wanted to make sure I knew everything possible about the Bobcats Hockey team to help prepare me for these events, so they spent the last few days teaching me everything Bobcats-related.

Guilt flutters in my stomach at the fact that I still haven’t told either of my bosses about my personal connection to Greyson.

When I finally had a couple hours alone with Paige the other day, just as I was working up the nerve to explain everything, she took the opportunity to thank me. I tried brushing it off, but then she explained that Garrett is also the owner of the Bobcats Hockey Team. On top of that, he had become close to Greyson through one of the other players. They were both thankful that I was taking everything so seriously.

Knowing that my boss has a personal investment to ensure this contract goes smoothly adds a whole different layer to the mess I’ve found myself in. So not wanting to disappoint either of them, I kept my mouth shut and focused on learning what I could.

However, now that I have four hours before the first contracted event, and before I see Greyson again…I’m panicking.

Eva turns to me then, a gentle smile softening her features. “Stells, it’s gonna be okay.”

“How?” Dropping my head into my hands, I let out a frustrated sigh. “I’m an idiot for thinking I could do this. I should have walked away.”

Arms wrap around me and the next thing I know, I’m being tucked into Eva’s warm embrace. She simply holds me for a minute, rubbing a hand soothingly up and down my back before speaking again.

“First things first, you’re not an idiot.” She pulls back, holding me in place by my shoulders as she levels me with a serious expression. “Secondly, if you truly thought you couldn’t or shouldn’t do this, you would have walked out before even speaking to him. You know your limits. I might not have known you when you two were together, but I saw you in the aftermath of him. More importantly, I’ve seen you accomplish and overcome so much hurt and pain. I witnessed you have a beautiful baby girl and raise her all on your own.”

I shake my head. “I had Nana. I had you and the girls. I didn’t do it?—”

“Stop that. Yes, we held her while you showered or took a nap and helped babysit when you had class. But the things we helped with weren’t the hard work. Hell, the things we did were simply the bare minimum part of being a good friend.Youdid the hard parts. All on your own. Having a support system does not discredit the strength it took for you to raise your child.”

My mouth drops open to say something, anything in response, but I find myself speechless. Eva takes that to her advantage and continues.

“In all the time I’ve known you, I’ve watched you accomplish everything you have put your mind to. You don’t start something you know you can’t finish. Deep down, I think some part of you knew you needed this.”

“Why would Ineedthis? There’s no way this ends in anything other than a mess.”

Eva smiles, a hint of amusement sparkling in her green eyes. “Maybe so. But also, what if it doesn’t? I stand by my guess. You need this.”

I level her with a glare. “I do not.”

She shrugs. “Everyone needs closure of some kind. This is something you wouldn’t get if you never saw him again.”

My lips slam shut as her words hit their mark. I hadn’t thought about it that way.

“Still, that would mean I’d need to talk to him about something that’s not work-related. And that’s not happening.”

“Mhm, if you say so.” Eva doesn’t give me a chance to argue her point any further as she changes the subject. “Anyway, Garrett and Paige wanted me to make sure you had something proper to wear tonight.”

“What does that even mean?” I glance down at my outfit. It’s simple, a pair of tight black jeans and a dark red long-sleeved shirt. I had dressed it up with a gold necklace my nana gave me last Christmas and the matching small, teardrop earrings. Seeing as the Bobcat’s team colors were a deep red and golden yellow, I had thought my outfit was perfect for the game.

Eva rummages through her bag for a few seconds more before turning back to me holding up a Bobcats branded long-sleeved jersey, with the back facing me. For a second, I forget to breathe.

It’s been years since I’ve worn anything in support of him. Yet memories of me saving up to surprise him with me in a sweater that had his number on it come flooding back. He had been so happy, smiling and showing me off to everyone while whispering in my ear how good his name looked on me.

Shaking off those thoughts, I focus back on the new jersey.

The red of the jersey has a shine to it that my current shirt lacks. His last name is in capitalized golden yellow letters at the top with his number, seventeen, big and bold in the center. There are bands that go around the waist of the shirt near the bottom and around the biceps in the same shade of yellow.

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