Page 14 of Havoc

“Yeah,” he said as he took another drink. “I got in a lot of trouble with my club for that.”

“Well, I’ll tell you a little secret. I think Detective Slater was pissed that I turned him down, and his plan was to arrest me and put me in a cell where he could get to me anytime he wanted.”

“Or scare the fuck outta you, so you’d agree to whatever the hell he wanted moving forward.”

“You’re right. I hadn’t thought of that. My point is that you were a hero that night.”

“Yeah, I know. It seems that I can never leave well enough alone when I see a woman in danger.”

I reached out and took his hand in mine. “What the hell happened between that night and now?”

He looked down at our joined hands and swallowed thickly. I could tell because his Adam’s apple moved up and down. “I don’t rightly know. Maybe I got tired of fucking up and getting called out for it. It’s frustrating and puts me in a pissy mood.”

I finished his thought for him. “That dressing down Storm gave you hurt your pride. You’re sick of your life and ready to give up. You hide it well, but I know all the signs.”

“What the fuck does it matter? Someone close to me once said, ‘Once a fuckup, always a fuckup’ and I don’t think he was wrong about that.”

“He was wrong alright, though. If people couldn’t change, people like me would be out of a job. Not only is change possible, but I believe you’re ready for it in a big way, Havoc. Deep down inside, you know that what I’m saying is true.”

“Yeah,” he said before downing the rest of his drink. He came to his feet and looked down at me. “New plan. From now on, we meet here at the clubhouse three nights a week. You’ll stay and get to know my world. Otherwise, you won’t know enough about me to give me what I really need. Are you in or are you out?”

Scrambling to get my head around this new curveball, I told him, “I’m in. What three days do you want?”

“You pick.” Pulling a business card out of his pocket, he tossed it down on the table. “Whatever you choose is fine, just text me. We meet here at seven and leave when it stops being fun. How about that?”

“Wait. What are you talking about? Working together is not supposed to be fun for me. This isn’t a date. It’s a professional relationship.”

“Yeah, I get that. You’re uptight, like a schoolmarm. Do you know that? You need to loosen up a bit.”

A memory of Slater telling me I needed to loosen up on the dance floor came to mind. I felt my expression change to an unhappy one. And Havoc noticed. I could tell because he rushed to apologize.

“Sorry about the schoolmarm comment. I’m just saying there’s no reason you can’t have some fun while learning about club life. I need you to understand my life if you’re going to help me.”

I nodded, wiping the hurt expression from my face. “Yeah, I get that. Why don’t we say Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for an hour minimum?”

His expression closed down, and he mumbled, “Sure. That’ll be just fine. Since today’s Sunday, I guess I’ll see you on Friday. Do you need me to walk you out?”

I shook my head, realizing this man was going to be way more than I’d bargained for. We hadn’t known each other a full two hours, and I already needed to decompress because he was exhausting.

“No,” I told him. “I know the way out. It’s the same as when I came in, only in reverse.”

I saw a hint of a smile ghost across his face. “Alright then, I’ll see you on Friday.”

I reached my hand out to shake, and when his big hand caught mine, it made my skin prickle. He gave my hand a single pump and let it go. It made me remember when we’d shaken earlier, and he’d kept holding my hand. I did an about-face and walked through the back door.

Once I was inside the building, I fast walked to the front door. When I pushed the heavy door open and felt the sunshine on my face, I was finally able to let go of the anxiety twisting in my gut.

As I drove home, I replayed the conversation I’d had with Havoc in my mind. I didn’t get the feeling he was particularly toxic—more like he was suffering from some kind of trauma. If so, he wouldn’t be the first client I’d referred for therapy. Something about Havoc pulled at my heartstrings. Maybe my unconscious mind was picking up on something I wasn’t fully aware of. Whatever was happening, I needed to shut it down hard. Being a big old softie when this stubborn biker clearly needed tough love simply wouldn’t come close to meeting his needs.

Chapter 6

Havoc

Iwas at a table in the back corner of the room, nursing a beer, not in the best of moods. Mostly because I’d spent the last thirty hours or so thinking about my situation. Truth be told, I didn’t like how Storm had told me that I shouldn’t think about working with Riley as a suggestion. It had sounded ominous and made me think I might be in more trouble than I originally thought. I’d been thinking that Storm would never throw me out of the club, but now I was second-guessing myself. It was dispiriting to think my club was fed up with me, ‘cause this was about the only place I felt like I really fit in. When I came to the Dark Slayers, I’d thought I’d finally found a brotherhood that accepted me. I guessed not.

Charlotte walked up, bringing me a refill on my beer.

When she set it down, I said, “Thanks, Charlotte.”