Page 82 of Home in Nevada

He raises an eyebrow. “Stuff, huh? That’s specific. Spill."

I hesitate, my pulse kicking up a notch. But this is Jamie. If I can’t say it to him, I can’t say it to anyone.

“Okay, but don’t laugh,” I warn, pointing a finger at the screen.

He smirks, leaning back against the pillows. “No promises.”

I roll my eyes, but I can’t help smiling. “I went surfing today. Or, well, that's not true... I went to the beach with Lucy. I didn’t actually get in the water, but I thought about it. Anyway, I realized... I used to love it. Surfing, I mean. It made me feel... free. Like myself. And I just gave it up because someone else didn’t like it.”

“Tiffany?” Jamie guesses, his tone sharper than usual.

“Yeah,” I admit, shrugging. “She didn’t trust me out there. Thought I’d cheat on her or something.”

Jamie’s face softens, but there’s a flicker of something in his eyes. Annoyance, maybe. “That’s messed up, Jeff.”

“Yeah,” I say quietly, my gaze dropping to the counter. “But it wasn’t just her. It’s like... my whole life, I’ve been chasing what everyone else wants from me. And I don’t even know who I am.”

Jamie is quiet for a moment, and when I glance back at the screen, he’s watching me with that look of his. The one that always feels like he’s peeling back all my layers and seeing the parts of me I try to hide.

“That’s how I feel about photography,” he says finally, his voice softer now.

My brows furrow. “What do you mean?”

“When I’m behind the camera,” he explains, “it’s like... nothing else matters. It’s just me and what I see. I don’t have to think about who I’m supposed to be or what anyone expects from me. It’s the only time I feel completely... me.”

His words hit something deep in me, something I’ve been trying to put into words all day. “That’s exactly it,” I say. “That’s what I’ve been missing.”

Jamie smiles, a small, understanding curve of his lips. “Then maybe surfing’s your thing, like photography’s mine. Maybe it’s not just something you used to do—it’s something you need to do.”

I take a shaky breath, his words sinking in. But there’s more I need to say, more I need him to understand.

“It’s not just about surfing,” I say, my chest tightening. “It’s about... you.”

His eyes widen slightly, but he doesn’t interrupt.

“You’re the one person who’s always made me feel like it’s okay to just... be me,” I continue, the words tumbling out before I can stop them. “Even when I tried to push you away, I always found myself coming back.”

Jamie stares at me, his expression unreadable, and my heart feels like it’s about to beat out of my chest.

“I want you to come visit again,” I finally say, quieter than I mean to. “I want to show you more of LA—my life here. The parts of me I haven’t shared with anyone else. The places I know you’ll actually like.”

There’s this pause where the only sound is the faint hum of the video connection. It’s agonizing. Then Jamie smiles, and it’s that soft, warm smile of his that punches me in the chest every time. Just like that, I can finally breathe again.

“Okay, Jeff,” he says, his voice steady, but I can hear the smirk behind it. “I’ll take some time off and come visit. But only if you promise to take me surfing. And—” He leans closer to the camera, that damn grin growing wider. “I get to pick your bathing suit.”

I blink at him. “Are you kidding? Hell no. I know exactly what you’d pick out, and for the record, I wear a wetsuit—”

“Lame,” he cuts in, lounging back on his bed like this is just another Tuesday. “No eye candy, no deal.”

I just stare at him, my brain short-circuiting for a second. But then I shake my head, narrowing my eyes. “Oh, you wanteye candy?Is that what you want?”

His grin falters for half a second, like he wasn’t expecting me to call his bluff, but he recovers fast, resting his chin on his hand. “Always.”

Without breaking eye contact, I grab the hem of my shirt and pull it off in one motion, tossing it to the floor. Then I lean in close to the camera, giving him the full view of my bare chest. “How’s that, huh? Enough for you?”

The tension between us builds in the silence that lingers, humming through the phone like static electricity. His gaze stays locked on mine, dark and unflinching, sending a rush of heat straight to my cheeks. My skin prickles.

Jamie leans closer to the camera, his smirk returning with a vengeance. “You think you’re clever, huh?”

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