Page 76 of A Quick Stop in Paradise

“Why?”

She shrugged wildly. “Because! Because I’ll… because I’m fucking stupid, that’s why. And I know I’m going to spend two seconds with her and be stupidly in love with her and I’m working tomorrow and the day after and then she’s going to leave, so I won’t get as much time with her as I want, and I’m going to be fucked up for years because—because she’ssogood and she’ssofar out of my league, and I just thought—I mean, I don’t know, I promised I’d have a hookup! A one-night stand! This was close enough!”

“You’re already basically in love with her as it is now. Isn’t it better to have three partial days with her than to have just one night? You don’t really think it’snotgoing to hurt just because you cut it off like this, do you?”

“I’ve got… too many… issues,” she muttered, burying her face. “She’s so good, and… if I keep doing this, then I’ll start getting ideas about being able to do more with her. And then I might do something stupid like ask her about that, and then she’ll laugh in my face and tell me how I’m ugly and annoying and just good to keep her company for an orgasm while she’s bored on vacation, and she’ll leave and never see me again, and I’ll look her up and see her with some guy who looks a million times better than I do, being all happy and in love, having a million babies, and I’ll walk into the fucking ocean and fucking die.”

“Or she might have had sex with you because she’s into you.”

“I doubt that.”

“It’s not that weird a thought.”

She crossed her arms, looking away. “It is. And we didn’t have sex!”

“Uh-huh…”

“We just… did our own things.”

I nodded. “Right. Would you do that with a man?”

She cleared her throat, and said, very quietly, “No…”

“Because you’re not into sex with men.”

“That’s… different.”

“If you were exclusive with somebody, would you do that with somebody else?”

“No—of course not!”

“Because it’s sex?”

She buried her face in her hands again. “Okay, maybe it waskind ofsex. I don’t fuckingknow.Either way, it’s not like she’s going to feel anything for me like what I feel for her!”

I shrugged. “You’re already going to regret not having more time with her whatever happens. It’s too late to not catch feelings for her. Just enjoy it while it’s happening. Who knows? Life surprises you anyway.”

“There’s no way I have a chance anyway,” she mumbled. “She probably hates me since I said no. It was all awkward and embarrassing for everyone… I lied and said I had other plans, but she totally knew I was lying, so we were all just politely pretending we all believed this, and then she went off to see her family, and I’m an idiot.”

“Allison, look me in the eye right now and tell me youwon’tregret missing the chance to maybe get her off yourself next time.”

She choked. “Brooklyn! I swear to god.”

“What? Am I wrong?”

She didn’t say anything, blushing furiously and looking down.

“You’re picturing it now, aren’t you,” I said flatly, and she bristled at me like an angry gutter cat.

“Ugh! Leave me alone!”

I laughed, patting her on the shoulder. “All right, I will. Just think about what I said. I’ll bet you a million dollars Stella would gladly go with you if you came back and saidhey, sorry, I was lying about my plans, I was just nervous, can we still do dinner?”

“She’s got way better things to do,” she mumbled, picking at her fingernails.

“Didn’t stop her from doing you,” I said lightly, and she blushed viciously again, hunching her shoulders and standing up.

“Oh my god. You’re the worst. I’m going back to my place. Go… hang out with your girlfriend.”

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