Page 28 of Petals for Deadly Power

“Other than talks about beds and fucks, do you do any work around here?” Arabella asked, shoving a bunch of perfect blond waves behind her shoulder.

“Give us a break, will you?” Jake said. “It was an exhausting night.”

“I know. Iheard. But I thought you brought me here to show this woman how to dominate Taking like a professional.”

17

Ayla

Fromthecouchina cabin that was not hers, Ayla looked through the curtainless window to the unrealistic view in front of her.

Surely the courtrades couldn’t have traveled that far in one night.

Surely the Cardinals had to give the heir of the North House a better chance than this.

Surely the perfectly smooth ramp emerging from the sea waves into the clouds above was a mirage and not the North Cardinal’s ordeal of the Fifth crusade. Because if it was, then the transparent crystal hill reflecting the colors of the rainbow as the sunlight hit the water underneath was there for her. And only her.

Ayla felt set up and absolutely doomed. She was not ready to be the striver of anything today, not after a night without sleep. Definitely not the striver of an ordeal that would put her life at risk. She had been at risk of freezing to death all night.

And what a night that had been. At first, she had been Giving animals made of silver sparks, hoping—in vain—that the cats and dogs around her legs and trunk would give her some warmth. Then, after so much Giving her inner scale tilted and her green eyes started to feel sore, Ayla somehow stripped the night-patterned curtains from the windows of her cabin bare and wrapped them around her body. Whatever material they were made of was better than before.

Later, in a semi-awake doze between exhaustion, concern, and blindness, she had walked towards the rooms of Indianna, Raoul, and Nina, covering them with the curtains that she also ripped off their rods. Finally, she must have lost the last thread of consciousness while falling asleep, because she had just awoken on the couch in Nina’s cabin.

She didn’t even care if the white-haired, stunning woman thought she was creepy for walking into her room in the middle of the night and covering her trembling, curled body with destroyed curtains. Ayla cared that at least they were still alive, now that the sun had appeared blasting through the windows that had never lacked curtains so much.

The sight of the ramp emanating from the Radel Sea up into the sky was a nightmare not nearly as bad as the one she had just woken up from.

Thatnightmare was about her twin sister being tortured by the Organ Mandor in front of all the panoms of Thyria, because Lenna had been stubborn and hopeful enough to try to protect Raoul from being killed after the Mandor finished experimenting with his psychic state.

That wasn’t the true nature of her nightmare. It was a memory, and Ayla welcomed it to her mind on certain nights as a form of penitence for the devotional obedience and belief on the system she had for over two decades. For thinking that somehow, her father or mother would step up and protect Lenna from being exposed, bleeding, begging, and sobbing.

Ayla would never forgive herself for allowing the Organ Mandor to publicly torture a twenty-five-year-old woman who lacked good manners but had good intentions at heart. Even if Ayla knew that, had she stood up and said anything, she would have been tortured as well.

But that wasn’t what she had done. All Ayla had been capable of doing that night in the Cardinals Temple was stay rooted to the floor, clenching her fists so hard her nails cut through the skin on her palms, seeing each stab as if the speed had been slowed down so much it nearly halted. Her body shook every time the Red Lawful Stab had made contact with Lenna. Ayla’s beliefs in the political system and how society worked sliced her own mind at the same time as the blade sliced the skin of her twin.

The unmitigated shock had kept Ayla from moving, from acting, fromhelping. Nothing would ever make her feel so powerless and paralyzed.

Ayla blinked twice to confirm what she already knew: that the crystal ramp in the sea was not going anywhere. If the North Cardinal truly wanted her ordeal to happen now, she might as well not make her wait.

After stretching her limbs, she folded the curtains and left them on the couch. Her silent steps stopped when Nina rolled her body quietly on the bed. Ayla stayed still, praying to the Cardinals that the ocean-eyed, snow-haired beauty wouldn’t wake up. She didn’t want to see the worry in her usually cheerful face. She didn’t want to be thecauseof her worry.

Nina didn’t move further, and Ayla found her steps following the foolish impulse to get closer to her rather than to the door she needed to head to.

She shouldn’t be here. She should totally not be staring at Nina’s pale, smooth skin, listening to her steady breathing sounds, admiring what a precious soul she had in such a world of corrupt beings. Ayla pushed her own long, smooth red hair behind her neck. If she was honest with herself, she had never been able to stay away from Nina, not since their eyes crossed paths. But this? Was she a psycho? To be invading her privacy . . . Something was very, very wrong with her.

Ayla pulled her hand back from where it had been mere inches from caressing Nina’s hair. No, she wouldn’t be that creepy. She couldn’t take advantage of someone who had only been pure, cleansing, and refreshing to her soul.

This moment—this very intrusive, forbidden and secret moment—had only happened because the North Cardinal’s ordeal had every probability in the world of killing Ayla in usual circumstances. Even more in her unusually cold, shitty circumstances. Regardless of the circumstances, the ordeal was happening, and it was happening now.

Ayla wasn’t surprised to not find anyone awake as she walked to the upper deck of the navia. The courtrades were probably sleeping after a busy night.

Gentle waves crashed against the navia, the sound peaceful and relaxing. She allowed herself a moment to close her eyes and breathe. She breathed in the motivation to get the red crystal feather of the North Cardinal’s ordeal. She breathed out the mistakes of her past.

She breathed in as she Gave herself more suitable clothes for what she was about to do next; she breathed out every fear of not seeing anyone again if she didn’t make it out alive.

Ayla climbed the rail, breathed in again, and jumped to the Radel Sea.

18

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