Page 36 of Betrayed Mate

I snorted. His regretful tone didn’t make sense. He’d been a dick ever since he pulled me from the water, and the only reason I’d been biting my tongue as much as I had was because hehadsaved me from drowning. “I have a hard time believing that. You were going to leave me on the side of the river without any help. If not for your pack members, I might have wound up dead.”

He flinched then exhaled and lifted his head so our eyes met. “You’re right, but I’m trying to find the real enemy and didn’t want to be slowed down. It was one life at stake compared to thousands I’ve sworn to protect.”

Inhaling sharply, I shook my head. “You were willing to let someone of your own species die when you’ve sworn to protect us? Do you realize how contradictory that sounds? If you start deciding whose lives matter and whose don’t, you take on the role of Fate, which isn’t our place in this world.”

The luster appeared in front of his eyes once again. “I’m not asking for your opinion on how I handle things. I just realized when you walked away that maybe I was too hard on you.”

“Toohardon me?” I parroted and clenched my jaw. Too hard was when you told someone they should’ve done better after they gave it their all. This…this was just cruel. “Why don’t we call it what it is? You’re a control-freak jackass. I feel horrible for your pack because you have no problem with alpha-willing them, and the fact that you can’t control me drives you crazy.”

“It does.” He sighed, the sheen flickering in and out of focus. “Because I’m not used to being disobeyed, especially when I’m doing things for specific reasons.”

“If you had reasons for tormenting Simon,pleaseshare them with me. Explain to me why I was wrong.” I crossed my arms, daring him to. Even though I hated to admit it, I wanted to know why he was so convinced that torturing Simon was the right call. I wanted it to be more than just him having no problem inflicting pain on someone else.

“As much as I would love to explain everything to my pack and to you, I can’t.” He shook his head and straightened his shoulders. “So you’re just going to have to trust me.”

“Trustyou?” He couldn’t be serious. All my life, I’d heard stories about the way the Grimstone pack was run and the viciousness they practiced in the name of protecting the royals, and since meeting him, I’d found he lacked so many morals that I valued in a person and leader. “You’ve donenothingto deserve my trust. In fact, everything you’ve done has made me see how you toe the line of doing just enough that the wolf shifters don’twant to get involved…for now.” If he tried torturing an innocent wolf shifter or even a witch with pack ties, our specieswouldget involved, and it would not go well.

He winced, the golden flecks of his eyes warming the brown color. “It’s all to discover who slaughtered the royals and our packs, Ember. Don’t you see that?”

“No, I don’t. But even if I did, is the cost of losing who you are as a person worth it?” My heart quickened as if his answer was important to me.

His forehead furrowed, but then the strange sheen slid firmly over his irises once more. “Yes, because they’ll continue to slaughter us at will, and I’m the protector of our species. I don’t take pleasure in torture, but the burden lies squarely on my shoulders now, and I’m doing what has to be done.” His words sounded emotionless and fit the arrogant alpha I’d come to know.

I rolled my eyes as my anger spiked. What sort of narcissistic asshole thought they knew best and could protect the whole world all on their own? A dictator, that’s who. And that’s exactly what he’d become to his own pack. “You must think awfully highly of yourself to take on protecting our entire species, especially after being unable to protect the royals and your own pack.” I slapped a hand over my mouth, surprised by my own words. I hadn’t even processed what I was about to say, and now I’d sounded almost as cruel as he was.

His eyes darkened once again to where I couldn’t see the color anymore. The little bit of the person his pack members had told me about vanished, and I swallowed. However, this version of Ryker I understood, and seeing him helped me remember all the reasons I should never be around him.

“I think I’m not the only one changing after suffering a loss like that.” He arched a brow and sneered. “Because, based onyour reaction, the old Ember wouldn’t have said anything like that.”

My face heated, and I hated how accurately he’d just called me out. In fairness, I’d just done the same thing to him. I deserved it. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have—”

“Don’t apologize to me. You meant it.” He crossed his arms and tilted his head. “You just hate that you spoke the words out loud to me. See, that’s the difference between only thinking it and having the guts to say it.”

I straightened my shoulders. “What I think in one moment doesn’t mean it’s my truth, and sometimes, it’s better not to say something without thinking through the consequences.”

“Maybe in normal times, butRebel, we’re at war. We don’t have time to cater to people’sfeelings. If we waste time like that, then our enemies will find us, and we’ll be dead.”

He’d completely missed my point, and my hands itched to strangle him. “It’s not necessarily only feelings that would be impacted.” I jabbed my finger in the direction of the woods. “You just tortured someone who witnessed an entire nest get destroyed. Someone who might’ve been willing to talk if you hadn’t started drowning him, especially since we all understand what he’d just gone through.”

Groaning, Ryker rubbed a hand down his face. “Get over the fucking vampire. You’re investing way too much time in him.”

With hurried steps, I moved within a few feet of him. “That’s my point. Who’s going to want to help you when word gets out that you have no issues tormenting someone?”

“First off, he was a vampire. No wolf shifter or witch is going to care.” Ryker dropped his hands, his expression sharpening. “And second, I don’t care if you don’t agree with my strategy. My decisions are my own, and I do what I believe is necessary. I followed you to ask you to come back, so are you coming back with me or not?”

Wow.We didn’t know each other well, and what we did know of each other drove each of us insane, but he’d come after me remorseful then changed back into the jackass I’d been determined to get away from. I’d known better than to stop to talk to him. Damn my traitorous legs. “And why would I do that? You were the one who basically told me to leave just now. Good job pretending to be sorry for a few minutes. You did enough to get me to listen to you. Untilnow.” Ihatedthat I’d been so foolish. I still didn’t understand why I’d even stopped.

Ready to fix that problem, I pivoted to get back to getting the hell out of here.

Feet shuffled behind me, and a massive hand caught my wrist and tugged me back around.

His scent filled my nose, making me dizzy and further pissing me off.

“Look, I get it, okay?” he said through clenched teeth. “You’re not happy with me. If we focus more on following your pack link while trying to find answers, will you stay?”

I jerked away from him, my skin colder where he’d touched me. “Yes, because going about things your way hasn’t worked. Look at where it’s gotten us.”

His eyes narrowed. “If you hadn’t—”

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