Page 84 of Last Shot

She should have seen it coming. They were too far apart, with Bessy’s handbrake in between them, for him to catch her off guard. But he’d been moving closer ever since she’d pulled over, she hadn’t even considered what he was thinking—

She should have been prepared to stop it. Not because she didn’t want it. God, no. She wanted it more than she’d ever wanted anything. But her heart could not withstand any more of his tiny betrayals. And every time his mouth left hers, it was treason of the highest count.

He pulled back. ‘I wasn’tpretending, Maxella. I meant everything. But every word I said after was true too.’

You’re not my type.

She pulled away, the scent of Christmas paper tingling every dormant part of her awake. ‘I know.’

‘I can’t talk about these things,’ he said. ‘I never— Ican’ttalk about that night, because it betrays Luca, the Barbaranis. It’s not that I don’t trust you.’

‘But your loyalty is to them.’

‘Yes. Always.’

‘Loyalty should go both ways.’

He breathed out; she wanted to capture that breath with her lips, have him breathe it into her instead. She needed to cut her head open, take out her brain and wipe out these thoughts like crumbs in between computer keys. She needed to bleach away the memory of last night. The feel of him.

‘You don’t know what they’ve done for me.’ Grey swallowed like there was glass stuck in his throat.

‘What have they done?’

‘They gave me a home. Employment. Even after I left, even after I was discharged.’

‘Dishonourably?’

‘Who told you?’ His gaze was harsh but his voice had lost its bite.

‘Vittoria let it slip. Why were you discharged?’ She was being a cop, she knew it. But she couldn’t help it.

‘Oh, Max, for Christ’s sa—’

‘I told you Iperjured myselfin court.’

‘AndItoldyou, it’s not that I don’t trust you.’

‘Yes, I know, you’re a frightened little boy who can’t articulate his feelings. Draw it in the window condensation then, Greyson.’

His jaw tightened so hard she waited for his teeth to crack. ‘Drugs.’ He looked out onto the field. ‘There were drugs in my bed.’

‘Not yours, obviously.’

‘Why would you assume that? Am I not cool enough to do drugs?’

‘I saw your fridge. And I felt ...’your washboard chest. ‘That’s not the ... fridge of someone who’s an addict. Plus’—she dug her nail into the red etchings of the steering wheel—‘the being in control thing.’

It was a guess but his silence confirmed it. She turned to look out her own window. The wind was picking up outside, tugging the ancient trees in its pre-storm dance, and the sky was mottled grey, the threat of rain pressing down on the gold grass – the cows in the field next to Bessy carried on grazing. What a fucking simple, perfect life. Well, except for the fact that they were probably going to be shunted onto a truck to Fremantle and slaughtered. Max thought back to the news articles she’d read about Frankie’s animal warrior antics and felt a rush of affection for the youngest Barbarani.

She understood why Grey loved them, why he wanted to protect them. She understood the feeling of knowing you would jump in front of someone who you weren’t sure would jump in front of you.

Grey drew a heavy breath like he was about to scream. She whipped back to face him, but he was still staring out his own window.

‘Someone was assaulted on base during our training at Wagga Wagga. Alexandra’s friend. That’s how I know her. They wanted it swept under, but I refused.’

‘You told?’

‘Yeah.’ He breathed out, still not looking at her. ‘They questioned her, and the guy who did it. Both denied it happened. Next day they did a random room check and there was a bag of pills in my pillow I’d never seen before.’

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