Page 55 of Run with Me

“Neither did I, but I couldn’t resist when I saw you in that sunlight. Your hair looks golden. You look like a sunflower.”

I felt a delicate kick from Mary underneath the table, so I took his hand. The music was slow and I easily recognized the song because it had been playing on the radio every day. As I swayed to the words I want to know what love is, for the first time in my life, I felt the need to feel true love. I needed to feel it from the inside out. I wanted to smile every day, be happy every day, and give this little one in my tummy everything she has ever deserved. When Xavier held me securely in his arms, I could feel a portion of that. Was it because he was holding back? Or was it me, keeping my distance away fromhim?

The most difficult question to answer, though, was why I was even considering Xavier not holding back. I loved John. I needed him, and our baby needed him as well. Yet still, the man holding me in his arms had that aura about him that I felt missing in my life. But that was because I missed John, wasn’tit?

“Tell me more about your family, Xavier.”

“I would if there were anything to tell. Jack and I were raised in the same foster home. He’s like a brother to me. He’s the only true family I’ve had. You could say it was love at first sight since the moment he shared a piece of his gum withme.”

“That’s sweet. What about Casper? You lost your baby boy.” My heart ached when I said the words out loud, as if reminding myself that I too had lost one. I felt his body tense against mine, but a fraction of that stress disappeared when I let my fingers gently swipe over his neck above the shirt collar.

“He was very sick. I wanted to help him, but… I failedhim.”

“Mary says there was nothing anyone could havedone.”

“I was his father. He was counting on me, and I failed him. That’s why it’s so important for you to tell John. He’ll want to be there for his child. He’ll want to protect her as much as I wanted to protect Casper.”

“I know, and that’s why we should make that trip to Pace before it’s too late. I need to see John. I need to tell him about ourbaby.”

He nodded. “I feel like I should be objecting to this, but I think we can manage. You shouldn’t be afraid, Anna. I wouldn’t risk your life if I didn’t think I could pull thisoff.”

“Thank you. I don’t know what I’ll ever be able to do to repayyou.”

“Anyone who deserves your love must be very special.”

I felt my heart skip a beat. “Do you really think it’ssafe?”

“If it’s not, then I will make itsafe.”

Okay. We’ll make the trip, then.

Suddenly my heart began beating hard. I was full of nerves, and for a moment I felt as if someone had shot adrenaline straight into my veins.

“Why are you doing all this? Why are you so good tome?”

“You’re a very special woman. You deserve to be loved with a whole heart, Anna. If you ever let me, I would love you. I would love you like a man should love a woman; but your soul and your body deserve all my attention, and I can’t give that to you until it can all be accepted. But I’ll wait and I’ll be there in whatever capacity you need me tobe.”

I gasped and felt something wet drip down the inside of my leg. A puddle of water formed on the floor, and my gaze connected with Xavier’s.

It looked like our plans to travel to Pace would have towait.

---