Page 78 of Reclaimed

“Of course.”

“How did you stay a virgin for so long?”

“Well, starshine.” He rolls into me and kisses me long and sweet. “I didn’t find anyone worthy of having sex with.”

My heart enters into a free-fall. “I mean, I know the mechanics, Aiden. I’m asking why.”

He kisses the tip of my nose and falls back onto his back. “I know. It’s not exactly warm pillow talk material.”

“I don’t need every conversation sanitized. I’m capable of listening to some raw truths.”

“Do you have some raw truths?”

I prop myself up on an elbow in my pillow. “I haven’t spoken to my parents since I moved out after high school, but a part of me still wants to name this baby after my dad if it’s a boy.”

His thumb skates across my cheekbone in the dark. “That’s a pretty raw truth.”

“Your turn.”

“From the ages of zero to nine, I grew up with loving parents. Not only did they love me, but it was obvious even to my childish eyes how much they loved each other. I remember that last summer my dad and I were building a deck. I mean, I was denting the wood every time I missed a nail, but you get the picture. He let me help.”

His chest rises and sinks with a slow, deep breath. “My mom was hanging freshly washed sheets on the line. Dad, god was he ever a goner, he looked over at my mom and just stared. I remember he stared for a long time so I asked him, “Dad, how do I get a wife someday?” And he said, “You wait, Aiden. I want you to wait for the one who makes you feel like you’re invincible. Because if you do it right, you’ll only have to find her once.”

Aiden clears his throat. “I didn’t know what the hell he meant at that age, and I don’t know why he said it, but I looked up to him so I took those words to heart. Two months later they were both killed in a car accident on their way home from dinner.”

Sorrow tightens my throat. “I’m so sorry.”

Aiden speaks his raw truths into the darkness. “I was sent to live with my dad’s brother. And for about a month, I thought it would be okay. He seemed nice. At least, he pretended to be.”

I find his forearm atop the duvet and grab his wrist. “You don’t have to tell me anything else.”

He flips our hands and laces his fingers firm with mine. The tight grip holds me to him like a lifeline. The pillow rustles as he turns his face to mine in the dark. “I want to,” he rasps.

I wrap my arm around his waist, anchoring him to me as he continues.

“He was a drunk. Spent nearly every night at the bar and more often than not, he brought home a woman. The house wassmall and in poor condition, so I could hear them through the walls. Sometimes they’d still be there in the morning and the way he’d look at them was so unlike any expression I ever saw on my father’s face. I was confused.”

His swallow is loud in the silence.

“For three years, I endured the scraps of food and the worn-out clothes. I later learned he used my parents’ estate to support his drinking problem while I went without. One morning, I walked out on my way to school and found him hurting one of the women he brought home. And I snapped. Got right in the middle of it and while she was able to crawl away, I took the brunt of his attack.”

“Aiden,” I gasp, covering my mouth too slow to dampen the sound.

“I never went back. Skipped school that day and started walking. By the time Nancy found me, I could hardly see, my eyes were so swollen. As I grew up, and hormones kicked in, I tried. Believe me, I tried to have a normal experience but I was always held back by the fear that I didn’t want to grow up to be just like him. I wanted to be like my dad.”

“You are nothing like that man. I hope you know that.”

“I do now.” He squeezes my hand. “I built it up into such a big thing in my head that the few times I tried, I couldn’t even get hard. After a while, I stopped trying.”

Emotion clogs my throat as I think of the broken little boy who grew up and just wanted what his parents had, but was too afraid to find it.

“But not with you.” He kisses my knuckles. “You broke the spell.”

21

Aiden

“Come on.I don’t need to take your money.”

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