Page 65 of Why Not Forever?

I let out a long breath. “Even if I fuck up.”

“Me, too,” Lis says. “And Derek and Ava, and Adalie and Nate. All of us.”

It’s nice to be reminded of that. Of the fact that, if things blow up between me and Tanner, my friends will be there for me. If my heart gets crushed, my friends will help me piece it back together. I can take this risk because they’ll catch me if I fall.

But mostly, I can take this risk because I trust Tanner. He’s not going to do anything to deliberately hurt me. If he doesn’t return my feelings, it’ll hurt, but it’s also not something hedidto me.

“Thanks, guys.”

“Anytime you need me to talk you off the ledge,” Spencer says.

We hang up and I go into the bathroom to brush out my hair and braid it. I wash my face and brush my teeth, returning to the bed with a notebook and pen and write out my new terms. I consider everything I want from him, how it can all work. I scratch some things out, write new ones. I think of everything I can, trying to be thorough. It’s not for nothing that I’m the CEO of Blue Vista. I like the details, making sure everything is accounted for. I bring those same skills here, trying to figure out how we go forward without either of us getting our hearts broken.

It takes me an hour, but I finish the list, and write it out on a clean sheet of paper. Then I wait. I try to read, but I’m listening too hard for the sound of footsteps and the key card at the door. I check the time every five minutes and watch as an hour turns into an hour and a half, then into two hours. I’m considering calling him to make sure he’s okay, when finally the door lock beeps.

He comes in and pauses, staring at me on the bed for a moment before taking off his shoes.

“I kinda hoped you’d be asleep,” he says, looking down at his feet as he sets the shoes aside.

I stand, picking up my paper in trembling hands. “Because it would have been easier than talking about what happened?”

His eyes flick up to me, then away again. “Yeah.”

He takes off his jacket and hangs it, and undoes his tie.

I take a deep breath, my heart racing, and blurt, “I want to renegotiate our contract.”

He blinks, looking confused. “What contract?”

“Our relationship contract. We never really wrote it out before. We just agreed to no sex.”

He looks stunned and I’m worried I was completely wrong. Maybe he doesn’t want me. Maybe I’m alone in how much I want him.

“Are you saying you want to have sex with me?” he asks.

“I—” I falter. Then I remind myself, this is a contract. Contracts are easy to discuss. I take a deep breath and motion to the table in the corner of our room with the two chairs. “Please sit, Mr. Marcus. I have a new proposal for you.”

His eyes drop to the paper I’m holding and he rolls his lips together, fighting a smile.

Just like that, all my nerves drain away.

“Absolutely, Mrs. Marcus. I’m eager to hear this proposal.” He sits and pulls his tie off, setting it on the table. “You don’t mind if I’m a little informal for this meeting?”

I gesture at my pyjamas. “You’re still more formal than I am.” I sit in the other seat and set the paper down. “Our original terms were that we would get married and live together. We would not see any other people. Our relationship is exclusive, but we wouldn’t kiss or have sex because that would complicate things.”

He nods, so I continue.

“My new proposal will complicate things,” I say with a measure of regret. “But I think we can both benefit from the terms.”

“Please elaborate.” He’s maintaining the serious façade, but I can see the glimmer of laughter in his eyes.

“I propose we start to date. We’ll pretend that my bedroom is my house and your bedroom is your house, and we can have sleepovers, but still actually live in separate places.”

He considers this with a dip of his chin. “This would give us our privacy still, even though we’re already living together.”

“Exactly. Our original end date will still be there for the marriage if we decide it’s not going to work out between us. But if it does…”

“If it does what?” he asks. “Work out between us?”

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