Page 102 of Playing to Win

“I owe you an apology for that.”

He looked up under his brows, frowning. “What for?”

I sighed. I didn’t like apologizing, but I was in the wrong. “I was not the supportive girlfriend you needed. Of anyone, I should have known better.”

He shook his head. “You never wanted to date a hockey player. You don’t need to be pushed aside for someone else.”

“But I’ve been through playoffs. I know how important it is to focus. Not that playing a sport means you get a pass to always be the center of everything. But during the playoffs like this? If it was me playing, I would have pushed aside all distractions. Instead, I kept going on and on about this thing in Montana this summer.”

“I appreciate that you’re doing that. I had no idea what all I was taking on.”

“What I was doing was good. But distracting me from my own problems by trying to get you to focus on it before your games was not.”

“It’s coming fast. You had to get things settled.”

I shook my head. “It’s more than organized enough for now. We still have a couple of weeks before we start. I had a hole that hockey was leaving in my life and filled it with this project so I didn’t have to think about what I was losing. And I ignored what you needed so I could stay in my little bubble.”

He blinked at me. “Really?”

“Really. I mean, this project was a lifesaver. It gave me something to do, and I felt like I still had value, you know? I couldn’t focus on anything else connected to hockey, or I’d remember what I’d lost. But that’s not healthy, so I’m going to start seeing that therapist Cooper got the team to pay for. I need to work that out.”

“That’s really smart.”

“I didn’t want to deal, but I need to. And while I don’t think your job on the Blaze is more important than anything I do, when you’re in the playoffs you do get to be a priority. And I didn’t do that. I’m sorry.”

Suddenly his arms wrapped around me, and I melted. This was where I wanted to be, but if he really wanted to break up…

“I was so scared, Jayna,” he said into my shoulder. “That I couldn’t do this, couldn’t play in the NHL. That I’d blown my chance. And I wanted to do something to fix it. And I thought maybe if I gave you up, it would all balance out somehow.”

I gripped him back, tightly. “You don’t have to give up anything. You’re good, and you’ll still have a chance. I swear. But I want to be with you.”

“You do?”

I held up my hand, pinky stretched out. “Pinky swear.”

He shook his head but hooked his finger with mine. “Pinky swear. I want to be with you. I just felt like…I had to give up something big. And, well…”

I glared at him. “I get enough criticism of my size from my mother.”

“It’s not about how you look. It’s the way I feel about you.”

Something inside swooped from my abdomen to my chest, making breathing almost impossible.

“Yeah?” I forced out.

“I’m in love with you. I was so happy to see you here this morning. I was afraid I’d totally blown it.”

I gripped him tightly again. “I love you too,” I muttered into his neck.

“Wait, what did you say?” He pulled away, a little grin on his face.

“I said your parents want to have dinner. Are you up for it?”

He shook his head, then winced. “We’ll work out something. What did you say?”

“You heard me.”

“Come on, I said it.”