Page 76 of Playing to Win

Morning meant facingreal life again. I pushed Braydon to take his usual run and then caught a lift with him to the arena. Since there was a game that night and I’d be working through it, I had time to transit home and shower before heading back to my office.

“You okay?” Kira asked when she stopped by.

I shrugged. “Okay enough.”

“You’ve been doing great with Mitchell. Every second post he’s made has been about the Bonfire game this weekend. Ticket sales are up twenty-five percent. Merch sales are also up, even yours, and you’re not playing.”

“You think it’s because of him?”

Kira shrugged. “It’s been the biggest change in our promo. The Bonfire are playing well, and you’re good at your job, but he’s got guys on the Inferno and Blaze liking and reposting his stuff, so it’s spreading farther.”

“That’s great. We appreciate the support.”

Kira nodded. “Once the Bonfire know about your knee, we should have a meeting. Discuss what’s going to happen once you’re no longer a Bonfire.”

My stomach clenched, and the breakfast sandwich I’d gobbled down threatened to make a return appearance. “Sure.”

Kira waved and left.

Fuck. I knew they’d have to replace me on the Bonfire PR team, but did this mean I was done with the Blaze as well? What the hell was I going to do with myself?

I wasn’t supposed to retire for years yet. I was going to play in at least one more Olympics, maybe two. The Canadian team was so strong, I’d be almost guaranteed another medal if I made the cut. With credentials like that, I had a chance for a future in hockey off the ice. Now, what did I have to offer anyone?

I pulled out my phone. This wasn’t something I wanted to show on my Blaze laptop. I logged into one of the job apps and did a quick search. The results were depressing. Toronto was an expensive city. I had some money saved, but the cost of living would eat that up quickly.

I breathed through the panic. I wouldn’t take any steps until the Bonfire finished their season. I’d find out how long I could keep working for the Bonfire and Blaze.ThenI would panic. In the meantime, I had work to do.

* * *

Saturday nightI was handling both the Blaze game and the Bonfire since they were playing on the same night. I was at the arena for the Blaze, since the Blaze were much bigger than the Bonfire as far as money and fans went. But this was the championship game for my team, so my heart was there. As it was, I was grateful for the distraction of the men’s game because the women’s game was tight.

No score after the first period, while the Blaze were up 2-1. At the end of the second period, the Blaze were up 4-1, but the Bonfire were still scoreless, down one goal. During the third, the Bonfire tied it up, but then allowed another goal. Instead of biting my nails like I would have done if I was there in person, I had to deal with two more goals scored against the Blaze, making their game a much closer 4-3.

There was a scuffle around the Blaze goal, and for a moment it looked like Braydon might be called in. It held up the game while penalties were sorted and Petey stretched, watched over by a trainer. In the end, Petrov stayed in the game and the Blaze protected their one-goal lead.

The Bonfire lost while all attention was focused on the net in this arena.

I ran through the motions of finishing the game coverage here, while my heart was breaking for my teammates. Part of me wanted to turn off any mention of the women’s game, pretend it hadn’t happened. But it was my job to post and monitor and respond.

The team was gathering at Anna’s house after and invited me to join.I should go.

I was still technically part of the team. But I’d wanted to say goodbye to the team when they were on a high. Not like this.

I finally dragged myself out of the office and headed to the regular exit since I wasn’t meeting Braydon. Most people had gone—this hadn’t been a big game for the Blaze. The cleaning staff was at work, but the hall was quiet as I made my way to the arena doors closest to the subway. I stepped out, bright lights illuminating the sidewalk like day. A voice came from beside the door.

“Hey.”

My heart accelerated for a moment, fight-or-flight response kicking in, until I recognized Braydon. He stepped out of the shadows, still in the suit he wore to the arena. I had my hand on my chest, catching my breath after the scare of someone appearing out of nowhere.

“Sorry.” He ran a hand down my arm, catching my fingers with his hand. “Didn’t mean to startle you. Just wondered how you were doing. I followed the game.”

He didn’t mean the Blaze game—he’d been watching that from the bench. He’d followed the Bonfire game. And then waited to see how I was doing. I’d never dated a guy like this before. Someone who just fit me so well. He was considerate. He understood my passion for my sport, and knew exactly what it entailed because it was the same for him. He saw me, understood me, and knew when I might need help.

The objections I had about dating a hockey player? Didn’t stack up against my need for him at this moment. Selfishly, I wanted something good in my life right now when so much was fucked up.

I turned to him, gripped his face in my hands and kissed him for all I was worth. Telling him I appreciated him, that he was incredible. That I needed him tonight, when my world was in chaos.

I pulled back. “Thank you.”

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