Page 14 of Unstoppable You

“Soon,” I told her. “How about we plan one for the end of this month?”

She squeezed me in a hug and then let me go. “Absolutely. I’ll talk to Jo and see what works for our schedule and school. Juni will be ecstatic.”

Larison stayed with me while I waited for the car to get here and then she sent me off and I went home alone.

At least I had a ton of croissants and muffins to keep me company.

Chapter Six

James

Connor attemptedto contact me again that weekend, but I sent him straight to voicemail. I didn’t want to hear anything he had to say right now.

The meeting with Delaney affected me more than I thought it would. For the rest of Friday and Saturday morning and afternoon I just kind of wandered around, unable to commit to or complete anything. I unloaded half the dishwasher, forgot the laundry in the washer, stalled out on my website updates, and set down every book I picked up.

Nothing grabbed my attention, so I gave up, put on some sad music, and curled up under a blanket in my favorite cozy chair by the window and watched the world go by. I’d anticipated feeling better after I’d talked to Delaney, but this feeling was way worse. Like I’d ripped open a bunch of old wounds that were now bleeding everywhere.

I wanted to fix it so badly. I wanted to make it right, but there was no way to make it right, short of time travel.

That was the worst part.

I honestly wasn’t in the mood to go anywhere on Saturday night, but I couldn’t turn down the Sexy Saturday drink specials and general merriment at the only bar for queer women in the state. I missed my old haunt in Boston, but Sapph looked like it could work.

Dressing in a pair of my favorite jeans and a lace top, I made sure I had my ID before checking my nose ring in the mirror and then hopping in the car I’d ordered.

A few minutes later I was dropped off outside the bar with its purple neon sign that made me instantly feel at home.

For the first time in several days, I smiled as I paid my cover and walked in. Noise and packed-together bodies greeted me, and I headed directly for the bar to order my first drink.

The bartenders worked like a well-oiled machine, so it didn’t take long until I had an icy purple drink in my hand that I’d ordered from the specialty menu. Didn’t really matter what was in it. I was just here to get a little buzzed and be around my people.

When I’d come out as a lesbian in college, it had made so many things clear for me. Like finding the answer to a math problem you’d been working your entire life to solve.

I managed to stake out a seat at the very end of the bar and let the music and conversation wash around me. Coming out tonight had absolutely been the right decision.

As I glanced around, I caught the eye of several women and considered taking things to another level tonight. Flirting was always on the menu for me, but sex wasn’t as casual for me as it was for other people. Sure, I’d done the bathroom hookup when I’d first come out and had discovered oh hey, I don’t hate sex, I actually LOVE sex with women, but I’d gotten that out of my system. I wouldn’t turn it down if the vibes were right, but that wasn’t what I was going for tonight. Dancing and flirting though? Yes, please.

By the time I had my second drink in my hand, I’d danced, I’d laughed, I’d flirted, and I’d forgotten about all the bullshit from this week. Well, almost.

Taking a break from dancing, I headed outside for a breather to let some of the sweat on my skin dry. Looking up at the sky, I squinted to try and see the stars. No luck. That was one of the only downsides of city living. Couldn’t see the details in the sky.

I moved away from the smokers to pull crisp air into my lungs before diving back into the maelstrom that was Sapph on a Saturday night.

* * *

I managedto drag myself to Pilates on Sunday, but Delaney wasn’t there. I hadn’t expected her to be, though. I’d probably driven her away from this particular class, which added insult on top of injury.

She hadn’t blocked me on social media, which was interesting. Every time I opened my feed, I saw that she’d posted something new. The algorithm seemed intent on putting her front and center for me.

It didn’t escape my notice that she’d deleted any of her posts with Connor. That made sense, and it was a little bit of a relief not to see his dumbass face refusing to smile as she beamed next to him. He couldn’t even fuckingsmilefor her.

If she was mine I would have…

No.Throw on the brakes, red light, do not pass go, stop that immediately.

That line of thinking would only torment me further.

* * *

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