Page 48 of The Outsider

Because it was like an invitation to wildness. To something deeper than the arrangements he’d always had. These very clear-cut sexual agreements that had no risk, and no real spark.

Sparks start wildfires.

And only you can prevent forest fires, dumbass.

“Where’s your little shadow?” Denver asked.

He gritted his teeth. “My little shadowisn’t actually my shadow, and she is at home.”

“Home,” Denver said.

“Yes. That is where she lives.”

“I thought this was all just temporary.”

“Well. It is. But for now, it is what it is.”

“Sure,” said Denver.

“How is she? As far as work goes.”

“She’s great,” said Justice. “She does the work of two people easily. And when she doesn’t have the know-how, she definitely has the enthusiasm.”

“You mean like the willingness to climb up on top of the barn roofs?”

“Exactly that,” he said.

“Great,” said Daughtry.

“You know,” said Denver. “I’m wondering about something.”

“What is that?” Daughtry asked, feeling irritated with his brother.

“When are you going to stop playing cops and robbers? You’re half in and half out of the ranch. And it isn’t like you’re gunning for a top-level position in law enforcement. So... what is the game?”

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?”

“Exactly what I said.” Denver straightened in his chair. “Sometimes I think maybe you took Bix on because she’s acting as your surrogate. Living in your house, coming to work for us every day. But it’s not you, Daughtry.”

“No,” said Daughtry. “It’s not. But I put work into this place whenever I’m not on shift.”

“But you’re on shift full-time. And like I said, you’re kind of half in both. That’s what I don’t understand.”

“Because it’s not about being the top of anything, or the head of anything,” said Daughtry. “I didn’t know that you cared about this. I didn’t know you felt like you needed a greater understanding about it. Because let me make it clear. Let me give you the rundown. Our dad was a miserable human being. He probably still is. He caused damage in this town, Denver, you know that. And I know you feel a sense of responsibility for it. Or you wouldn’t be off trying to pay for all of his mistakes—literally. I know you give Sheena Patrick money. That you sent her sisters to school.”

Denver’s lip curled. “It’s different.”

“The hell it is. It’s not different.”

“Yes, it is,” Denver said.

“All those people aren’t the surrogates for your redemption? Because actually, it seems like it’s the same thing. And if Bix is anything, then she’s that. It has nothing to do with me sending somebody to do my work on the ranch in my place.”

“I don’t understand the need for the job.”

“I didn’t ask you to understand it. You’re right about one thing, Denver. I’m not in charge of any otherplace, but you and I both know that I’m never going to be in charge here. I don’t want to be. I care about it. You handled it all your way, I handled it mine. We were both there, Denver. We both saw Dan Patrick die. We both have that feeling of... blood on our hands.”

“You don’t have to tell me about it,” Denver said.