Page 125 of The Outsider

“I know,” said Arizona. “And he really doesn’t deserve it.”

Bix hiccupped. “He really doesn’t.”

“All right, Bix. Let’s get you some tea. You can stay here. Until everything gets sorted out.”

“I have money,” she said. “I can get myself an apartment and I can...”

“Let’s just give it a minute.”

But while Bix wasn’t entirely hopeless, she did have one big black spot where hope had been once. And that was the place where her love for Daughtry had once been.

Chapter Twenty-Two

Daughtry waited for serenity. For something. He waited for control to come back. He couldn’t find it. Could feel it. He was bleeding out. He felt like his heart was going to come through his chest. He felt like he wasn’t going to be able to keep on breathing. It was a heart attack. Maybe. Or something.

He was standing there in the woods, and he needed to walk back home, but Bix might be at his home. And if she wasn’t, it might not be home.

He didn’t know what to do. He didn’t know where to go. He couldn’t recall that ever being the case. Not ever before.

He walked into the cabin, and sat down on the floor.

This was the place Bix had been sleeping when he’d found her.

It made him feel sick to his stomach. All of this did.

He waited. It got cold. It got dark. He still sat there.

He saw a flashlight beam outside, and got tense. If it was her dad and her brother come back for another fight, he was ready to give it to them. Because this was where he was. And it was who he was. And he couldn’t seem to find a way to fix it.

The door opened, and he shot up to his feet.

“At ease, soldier,” came his brother’s voice.

“What are you doing here?” he asked.

“When you didn’t come home I hunted around for Bix. Found her. Got the bead that you may still be out here given that she left you. I mean, left you left you. Both here physically, and emotionally.”

“Because I told her to,” he said.

“Yeah, I got that. Something about you trying to White Fang her.”

“I don’t even know what the hell that means.”

“I think you do. And I also think it’s accurate. Sounds like you said a bunch of hurtful things to drive her away.”

“Excuse me, you have the emotional literacy of a cabbage—what are you doing here lecturing me?”

“Oh, did it sound like a lecture? I didn’t mean it to. I was just repeating the things that you did back to you. If it bothers you, then you have a problem with yourself, not with me.”

“You judge me.”

“Yeah. I do. Because Bix is a cool woman. And you’re never going to find anybody else like her. So I don’t actually know what you’re doing. But then, you’ve always been a mystery to me. I don’t know what you want, Daughtry. Do you?”

“Yes. I want to do the right thing. I want to be better than our father. I want to be better than he raised us to be.”

“Join the club,” said Denver.

“We don’t go about it the same ways.”

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