Page 94 of Ruined Vows

He waves a hand, a larger gesture this time. “That was all just kid stuff. Dad’s finally at a place where he really believes in me.” He grins, flashing all his teeth. “Andis willing to invest.”

“Invest?” I ask, still baffled. “In what?”

He looks at me as if I’ve lost the plot.

“Inme. Haven’t you been listening to a single thing I’ve been saying? He finally believes in me. After all this time.” He laughs like he can’t believe it.

I can only stare at him, my mouth open. Is he serious? Just like that?

I want to keep protesting, both for his sake but also mine, too. Our entire lives, he had nothing but spite for his abusive father and the grimy, immoral world of politics his father inhabits.

Not to mention, I never agreed to be a politician’s wife.

But he’s already turning away to welcome and charm the shop owner, who’s come over to the table with the last tasting plate of our final cake selection. She’s a young blonde woman.Drew’s actual type, I can’t help thinking acidly.

“Well, yes,thankyou,” he grins up at her with that politician’s smile. “Thatdoeslook like the most delicious champagne cake I’ve ever seen in my whole darn life.”

I frown, staring. If this is all what I really think, then why the hell am I marrying him?

Because you’ll have nowhere to go home to!

Because this is the picture-perfect scene laid out inside the box!

Because nobody else will ever propose to you!

I frown deeper. Isthatwhat I really think? Or have I been letting anxious, panicked thoughts drive the entire direction of my whole life? And for how goddamned long?

“Darling, you’ve just got to have a bite. They’ve absolutely perfected it this time.” Drew extends a bite of cake for me.

Like always, the conditioning that’s driven me my entire life has me leaning forward to take the cake off the end of his fork.

Drew’s smiling eyes barely glance off me before moving back to the shop owner.

Why did I just do that? Why am I doinganyof this?

Under the table, I start spinning my engagement ring on my finger. Five times. Five times more. Five times more.

I look around, feeling suddenly horrified. Like I’m on the outside looking in at a stranger’s life.

Why am I sitting in this cake shop, about to marry a man who doesn’t even know me? Not the real me.

But this is the real you, says a voice in my head that sounds far too much like my mother’s.Do you think you’re any different than Drew, doing exactly whathisdaddy wants? Hahahaha. You never stopped being my good little Baptist daughter.You just became a slut for a little while. SLUT. WHORE. Jesus will forgive you and wash you in the blood. But only now that you’re back where you belong.

I push back from the table, clutching my purse to my chest. “I’ve got to go.”

Drew’s smiling face comes back to me. “What are you talking about? We haven’t tried the mimosa pairings yet.”

“I’m sorry.” I point a thumb toward the door. “Something just came up… with my advisor. Yeah. Sorry.”

“But I was hoping to talk with you.” Drew’s jaw tightens. “We never get to catch up anymore.”

“Next time,” I smile at him, practicing my poker face some more. “Seriously, I’d stay, but I’ve just got to—” I gesture over my shoulder again, then turn and flee out of the shop.

“What’s wrong?” Isaak says right as I burst through the door, those damn little bells jingling violently as I go.

“Nothing,” I hiss, suddenly just wanting as much distance between myself and this fucking cake place as possible. Drew might still run after me. And as much as he probably deserves an explanation, I just fucking can’t?—

I can’t deal with the implications of everything that was spiraling through my head back there. Maybe that’s all it was. Crazy thought spirals from the OCD. Intrusive thoughts.