Page 86 of The Secret Of Us

“You what?”

“I kissed someone,” I repeat.

I want to say it over and over until it feels real because at this point, I think I might be dreaming. It’s too good to be true.

Ravi doesn’t say anything, and although I can hear the party in the background, I pull my phone away from my ear to make sure it’s still connected. I hold it back up, listening intently as the noise dims.

“Okay, wait, I’m hiding in the bathroom. Did you just say what I think you said?”

“I kissed her,” I say again.

“Who?” He asks, and I realise he probably thinks I’m losing my mind.

I haven’t told Ravi about Izzy. It felt embarrassing to mention the fake dating scheme, considering it was born out of me being picked on by pretty much everyone in our year. I thought talking about her would make it worse when we ended it and never spoke again.

But I can’t help it now. This thing between us has to be real, she has to feel the same way I do, or we wouldn’t have kissed.

“There’s a girl in my class, and I don’t know what’s going on with us, it’s a long story that I’ll tell you another time, but I just kissed her.”

It comes out as one long rambling sentence. My mouth can’t keep up with all the thoughts running through my brain. Thoughts of kissing her again, of knowing she feels as deeply for me as I do for her—thoughts of a future together.

“You must really like this girl,” Ravi says, amusement in his voice.

“She’s amazing. The prettiest girl in the world. And God, she’s so smart. I wish I could see her brain. She’s funny, too. I don’t think I’ve ever laughed so much in my life. Whenever I’m around her, it feels like nothing else matters, like I don’t have to worry about anything at all.”

“Noah, my friend, you are in deep,” he laughs.

I really am.

“I’m glad you’ve met someone,” Ravi continues. “You deserve to be happy.”

For the past few months, I’ve felt like I don’t deserve anything good to happen to me. I thought that I’d have to suffer the consequences of my actions for the rest of my life, that I wasn’t allowed to find joy anymore. But hearing those words from him, I finally believe it.

“Thanks. I really needed to hear that.”

“I want to hear more about this girl. But not right now because I think someone is going to kick this door down if I don’t get out.”

Now that he mentions it, I can hear the faint sound of banging and yelling from his side of the phone.

“I’ll talk to you later,” I tell him.

A gentle tug on my arm has me hanging up the phone before Ravi can even finish saying goodbye.

“I’m all yours for the rest of the night,” Izzy says, and her eyes look like they’re sparkling, like the stars she loves so much are dancing in her eyes.

I wish she was all mine for the rest of my life.

I take her hand, intertwining our fingers together as I drop a quick kiss to her forehead. The smile she gives me lights up the night. I don’t think I’ll ever need to see the sun, moon, or stars again as long as I can see that smile.

* * *

The kiss has replayedin my mind every single day since it happened.

I go to sleep thinking about it.

I wake up thinking about it.

I dream about it.

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