Page 65 of The Secret Of Us

“I should get back to my room.”

I’m worried that if I stay any longer, I’ll say words I can’t take back.

“I’ll text you,” she says quietly, but she doesn’t look up at me.

I stand up, putting some distance between us to stop me from doing something stupid like touching her face again. I grab my bag and leave her room, not daring to glance back at her as another piece of my heart shatters.

23

NOAH

I tookIzzy’s advice and decided that spending three days with each of my parents was better than nothing at all. When I got back to my room last night, I texted both of them to let them know, and they said they were fine with however I wanted to do it. Mina’s more flexible about this whole thing than I am, so she’s going to go back and forth however she wants to.

I packed my bags last night, splitting my clothes between two so I can have one for each house. I don’t want to risk leaving anything behind and having to go back for it, so this seemed like the easiest option.

My phone pings, and I see it’s a message from Appa.

Appa

I’ll be there in ten minutes

I’m double-checking to make sure I’ve got everything I need when another text comes through. I expect it to be Mina nagging me about something, but it’s Izzy, replying to a message I’d sent her earlier.

Noah

Do you need help getting to your car?

Izzy

It’s okay, Isaac and Violet came to help me

I’ve gotten so used to going to her door every morning that it felt weird not to do it today. Of course she’d get help from her family though. I was silly for even asking. My phone rings once before it cuts out, Appa’s signal that he’s outside. I gather my things and leave my room, tucking my phone into my pocket. Mina is already at the car when I get there, throwing her bags into the boot before she runs around to get in the front passenger seat.

I put my bags next to hers and get in the back seat, murmuring a quick hi to Appa as he starts to drive away. I take my phone out of my pocket, opening it to Instagram and Izzy’s profile.

She’s uploaded a few photos of us together now, the first set being from the ones we took the day she told me about her parents. I couldn’t believe they let her and her brother go so easily, that they still don’t communicate with them properly.

I look at Appa in the front seat and wonder if I’m making us head down a similar road. As much as I’ve been avoiding my parents, I could never imagine a life without either. Those first few days after I was expelled were difficult, and although tensions were high, they both still tried their best with me.

It all came crashing down when Appa decided to leave though. The timing was too close for it to be purely a coincidence. Maybe I’m part of the reason he’s still staying away, too. If I tried speaking to him, could it help mend his relationship with Eomma, too?

“Appa,” I say, and his eyes flash to mine in the rearview mirror.

I didn’t think far enough ahead to actually know what I want to say to him. He glances back and forth between the rearview mirror and the road ahead, and I try to figure out why I called him.

“Hope you’ve decorated since the last time I was there,” I say, an attempt at a lighthearted joke to ease some of the tension between us.

The corner of Appa’s eyes crinkle right before he looks back to the road.

“Maybe you can help me with that. We can go shopping together, Adeul.”

Last year, that would have been the most harmless suggestion in the world. We’ve been on countless shopping trips together, and it’s never been anything special. But I feel like this time, it will be. Maybe I can get him to open up about why he left to help settle some of the guilt that’s been burning me up from the inside since the day he moved out.

“I’d like that.”

Mina cuts in before I can say anything else, deciding she should get a say in decorating, too. I listen to the two talk as the conversation shifts to how she’s enjoying school much more now. It sets my mind at ease to know that she’s happier here.

Somewhere along the drive, I fall asleep, only waking up when Appa has the car parked up and Mina’s already out of it. I exit, grabbing my bag from the boot before closing it and heading into the apartment building.

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