Page 32 of The Secret Of Us

“Another one of Aunty’s recipes?” I ask as I enter the small kitchen.

Isaac is standing by the stove, stirring the curry inside a big pot. The bright pink apron he’s wearing is an eyesore, but Violet’s mum gave it to him a while ago, and now he wears it whenever he cooks.

“Yep, she taught me this one last week.” He lifts the spoon, taking out a small piece of chicken that he eats. “It’s pretty much done, so grab a plate. There’s rice, too.”

The food at school isn’t bad, but nothing can beat a home-cooked meal, especially since Violet’s mum has started teaching Isaac how to cook. I take a plate from the cupboard and hand it to him so he can fill it up.

Violet enters the kitchen right as I leave it to sit at the small table meant for two people, but we’ve forced three chairs around it.

I can see them from here, and that ache hits me in the chest again. Violet has her hands around Isaac’s waist, the side of her face pressed into his back, with the most contented smile on her face. I imagine what it would be like to do that with someone, to have someone to come home to every single day and just be with.

Whenever I’ve pictured myself in any of these scenarios, it’s been a faceless figure, just a body with no real features. But this time, I see hazel eyes, black hair and a warm smile that startles me so much I drop my spoon.

“You okay?” Violet asks, and I hadn’t even noticed her enter the room with two plates. She sets them down on the table, a crease in her brow as she looks at me.

“Finger slipped.” I pick the spoon back up again, poking around the food. Suddenly, I’m not hungry anymore.

She nods, taking her seat as Isaac walks over to join us, the pink apron thankfully removed.

“How’s school been?” Isaac asks and I tell him everything I can that won’t make him worry. Which means I don’t tell him about Ryan or Noah or the fact that I don’t want to play hockey anymore. I’ll say it all at some point, but right now I don’t have the energy for it. He listens thoughtfully, and the light conversation finishes until we’ve all finished eating.

“Movie tonight?” Isaac asks, carrying all our plates to the kitchen, before I hear the sound of the tap running.

“I’m a little tired,” Violet says, stretching her arms above her head. “I’m gonna shower and head to bed, but you two carry on.”

Even after all this time, she still wants to make sure Isaac and I have enough sibling time without her. I’ve told her multiple times that I want her involved, too, but she thinks it’s important that Isaac and I spend time together.

Isaac comes back out of the kitchen, drying his hands with a towel. He drops it on the table as he stands behind Violet’s chair, resting his hands on her shoulders. She tips her head back to look at him, and he gazes down at her. I always feel like I’m intruding on something when they look at each other like this, like I’ve forced myself into their world when I should be an outsider. They’re the picture of domestic bliss, and that same pain wraps around my heart, like a fist clenching tight and reminding me of what I’ll never have.

I rub my sternum, drinking down the last dregs of my water as if it’ll make that feeling go away. Violet and I stand at the same time and we all busy ourselves getting ready for the night.

Once I’ve put my things in my room, I settle myself on the sofa. I can hear them both behind me, Violet’s soft laughter covering up Isaac’s whispers as they stand in the doorway of their room. Violet wishes me a goodnight before retreating into their room and Isaac joins me on the sofa.

“Scream, again?” he asks when he looks at the TV screen.

“It’s my favourite.” I shrug, because he really should be used to this by now.

Isaac’s sigh is the only sign of protest he lets out before he grabs the remote and presses play. Halfway through the movie, he reaches for his iPad that’s resting on the small coffee table in front of us. He opens up the drawing app he uses, and when I glance at the screen to see what he’s doing, I notice it’s the proposal video he’s been working on.

“Do you know when you’re going to do it?” I whisper.

“I need to tidy up a few things, but it should be ready soon. I was wondering if you could help me out actually.”

“Of course, whatever you need.”

“I need to figure out a way to get her to the cinema without actually taking her myself. I was thinking we could pretend there’s a movie you want to see. I’ll say I’m running late from work so I’ll meet you there, but really, I’m already getting everything set up.”

“Don’t you think she’ll get suspicious?”

“Not if you ask her. You know she always wants to hang out with you.”

I nod, knowing that I’ll go along with whatever plan Isaac thinks of so he can pull this off. He starts sketching again, and when I see the smile on his face, the earlier pain in my chest is replaced with happiness for my brother.

12

NOAH

Maybe I should have gone homewith Mina over the weekend because she seems to be holding a grudge against me right now. I take her bag from Appa’s car so I can carry it to her room, but she snatches it back from me and starts stomping toward the dorms.

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