Page 167 of Traitor

I swallow hard and brace myself.

This is going to fucking hurt.

Temper

I start at the beginning. Where any story starts.

I don't look at Bones. I just lean on the bike next to him and keep my eyes on the sky, stretched endlessly before us.

"I was abandoned as a baby. Left in the hospital. I never got a chance to know my birth parents. They didn't want me."

The words come out steady. Detached. But inside, something twists.

"It's weird, you know? Babies are always the fastest to get adopted, but I wasn't. I got shuffled around. Foster home to foster home. You already knew that part. But I never really told you about my life back then. I used to avoid thinking about it."

I take a breath, steeling myself.

"My first foster parents were good people. They took me in when I was a baby. I was with them the longest — until I turned eight. It was the only good time I knew."

I let my voice soften at the memory.

"They wanted to adopt me, but they weren't in their best years and the state was reluctant to approve the adoption. They were both well into their fifties. The social worker kept saying they wouldn't be able to take care of me long-term. That they weren't an ideal placement. But they loved me. They gave me a home. She developed early-onset Alzheimer's, though. And he had a bad heart. One day, he was just... gone."

I have to stop. Swallow hard. Force back the tears clawing up my throat.

"I still remember that morning. I usually woke up first and climbed into bed with them. But that day, when I curled up beside them, he was cold. I kept calling his name, but... I think, even then, I knew. She woke up, and—"

I shake my head. I don't need to say it. Bones can imagine the rest.

My chest feels too tight, and my fingers tremble slightly as I wipe the tears from my face.

"I couldn't stay with her. Not with the Alzheimer's. They moved me." I look down at my lap, let the tears slip freely now. No point in stopping them. "I called them Mom and Dad. Tod and Amelia. They were the only real parents I ever had."

I pause. Let the weight of it settle.

"She died a few months later. I found out in one of my other homes. They didn't even tell me right away. I didn't get to say goodbye."

Bones' arm comes around my shoulders, pulling me into his warmth. Holding me up.

"Take your time, baby," his voice is rough. "You don't have to tell me everything now if it's too much."

I shake my head against his chest. I want to.

"No, I need to. When we first met, we burned fast. I got lost in us, in you. I kept my past locked up tight because I didn't want to expose myself. I wanted a family, but I didn't want to be too vulnerable. I didn't want to talk about the things that made me who I was. Even Ria only found out all the details last month. I'm done hiding, Bones. I want the whole story out in the open."

I exhale slowly. Prepare for the next part.

"The next home I went to was... fine. As fine as it could be. But I was grieving. A little girl drowning in loss, lashing out in all the wrong ways. I refused to eat. Screamed and cried at night. Tried to run away to find Amelia, the only mom I knew, because I didn't understand why I couldn't just stay with her. I was difficult. And they weren't equipped to handle a difficult kid. So they shipped me off again."

I let out a humorless laugh.

"The next foster home had a little girl who didn't want to share her parents. She made my life a living hell. Picking at me, tormenting me in all kinds of ways. Looking back now, it wasn't her fault, not really. Her parents shouldn't have become foster parents if their own child wasn't ok with it. But anyway, it was a fucking mess. I snapped one day. Destroyed all her toys. And that was that. I was gone again."

I squeeze my hands into fists. Keep going.

"The next home was worse. The mom used to hit me with a belt whenever I did something wrong. And apparently, I did a lot of things wrong. I tried to run, but where the fuck was I gonna go? So they moved me again. This time, to the Millers."

I let out a shaky breath.

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