Page 129 of Traitor

She sighs, dramatically, like she's already exasperated with me. "I know. That's the only thing that made me decide it wasn't worth the headache. And I also preferredmy other plan. Just so you know, I also thought about calling the FBI on your ass again. But I did become a kidnapper in the meantime so... I had to scratch that idea."

I smile, leaning back against the cool metal of my bike, watching her with something close to admiration. "They have zero evidence on me or the club. And they wouldn't get any no matter how many times you called them."

She hums in response, already dismissing the conversation, opening the small box of chocolates with the same kind of eagerness that she used to have when she would steal my t-shirts after we made love. Like she wasn't doing anything significant, but it meant something all the same.

Her fingers work quickly, unwrapping one of the chocolate-covered plums, and she brings it to her lips, biting down slowly, savoring it. And then she groans.

It's quiet, barely there, but fuck, I feel it everywhere inside me.

A sound I haven't heard in years.

A sound that used to mean she was completely at ease with me, wrapped up in pleasure, lost in something so damn simple yet powerful.

And for a second, I feel fucking feral. Like I want to steal every sound like that from her lips, make her remember all the other ways she's made that noise before.

Her eyes flutter open, meeting mine, and something flickers between us. An old ghost. A shadow of something that used to be effortless. Before I ruined everything.

She clears her throat, breaking eye contact, shifting slightly as if realizing what just happened. "Still as good as I remember."

I swallow, fighting the heat crawling up my spine. "Yeah?"

She nods, chewing slowly, savoring the taste.

"I am curious to know what happened when the FBI came knocking," she muses, looking at me with wide eyes. She's fucking adorable.

I smirk. "They didn't find anything. Obviously, since I'm standing here. But they did destroy the clubhouse. That was a mess. Man-sized holes in the walls, floorboards ripped apart, furniture smashed to shit."

"Oh, they really wanted to nail you guys," she says, smiling wickedly.

"Yeah, cost us a pretty penny to hide every piece of evidence and then put everything back in shape," I deadpan.

She shrugs, completely unfazed. "Too bad, so sad."

I laugh. Fuck, I actually laugh.

She turns and sits, her attention back on the view. I sit beside her.

For the first time in years, we exist in silence.

A real silence. Not the one filled with darkness, pain and jagged edges, but something almost... comfortable.

Minutes pass before her voice cuts through the night. It's quiet, hesitant. "Bones, how do you deal with the rage? The one inside you that never seems to go away?" She exhales softly. "You seem knowledgeable about all things rage."

I sigh, running a hand through my hair. "My rage isn't like yours, Temper. Your demon is different. Mine is actually guilt. It took me a long time to realize it. And an ass-handing from Pops." I let out a breath, staring at the town below us. "I fight it every day. I find ways to push myself away from it. Because I know that if I let it consume me, it will devour me whole. There would come a moment when I'd wake up and there'd be nothing left of me. Just the demon."

She hums in thought. "If you'd ever actually live until that moment. Don't think I don't know it was the guilt that made you take every wound I gave without protest. It did appease my own rage demon, though. But at the same time, it's kind of scary, you know? Just one wrong slash of the knife and you would've been dead." Her voice is so quiet, I almost miss it.

"I would've taken the life of the man who once destroyed me," she continues. "But also the man I once loved, too."

My chest tightens.

"I keep thinking about coming face to face with Jinx." She exhales, slow, calming, like she's trying to stop herself from unraveling. "If your mighty plan that you refuse to talk about comes to fruition, that is. I know for a fact I want to make him hurt. Bleed. Rip him apart. But I don't know if that will help in any way, in the long run. If it won't be just another fleeting relief. Like it was with you. That's what scares me."

"How can I help, Temper?" I whisper.

She sighs. "There's nothingyoucan do." She looks down at the chocolate in her hand. "We can talk like this here, right now, but we both know that when tomorrow comes, we'll both be back at our battle stations. Feeding our demons."

"The only thing you can actually do is to not offer yourself as a sacrifice ever again. It would be hard to resist making you hurt, Bones, but I've come to realize that hurting you doesn't actually help me. It just makes me lose control. And I don't want to lose control anymore," she whispers.

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